At Aidan's conference last week, his teacher said he is still having some "control" issues during the day - things like getting up to sharpen his pencil when it doesn't need it and then having to rush his work so he makes some careless mistakes, fidgeting during circle time, sometimes touching the other kids in a friendly way but at inapporpriate times, etc. Importantly, she says he just needs to be be warned once and then he stops - until the next day. He also had a playdate here earlier this week and he was just super-goofy. The other boy - who is 18 months and 2 grades older - didn't seem to mind...but it made me nuts!

I am a little concerned that he's not maturing as fast as I think he should...but then I think maybe I'm just expecting too much from a 6 year old who, outside of school, is often the oldest chlid around. :dunno:

I looked up symptoms of ADHD (http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd/symptom.htm) and he has some of the characteristics...but not all. Aome, I'm sure, are just normal behaviors anyway...it's the collection of symptoms that point to diagnosis. Right?

For those who have kids dx'd ADHD or for anyone who knows more about this stuff than I do...would love to hear what you think. I know this stuff is over-diagnosed a lot and I'm not trying to sound a panic button here - his teacher wasn't concerned and says he's acting like most of the other boys (they feed off of eachother) and he takes warnings to heart and stops the behavior. Aidan and I are talking about what he needs to work on these behaviors, and I'm telling him it's ok to be silly and such, but that he just needs to pick more appropriate times and settings for the behavior. And I just don't know how to encourage maturity!

I think what you said about picking appropriate times and circumstances is the right thing.

All that you described sounds just like the boys in Addison's class. I do think the boys in general are "goofier" than the girls but unless all of them have some ADHD, it sounds pretty normal to me. But then Addison had a friend over last week and I was appalled at how ridiculous she acted, so I know girls can act just as immature as the boys.

Katie hasn't been dx'ed as ADHD but I do believe it is over diagnosed. If Aiden is stopping the behavior after a warning he does have the ability to control himself, he just forgets every so often. IMHO I don't think that is ADHD at all, that is being a 6 year old. Frankly, I hate that schools are pushing so much sit and quiet time on students all for testing. Kids that age NEED to get up and run around, they just don't have the self control to be at a desk for 8 hours a day and silent.

My dad's solution when my brother was having problems like that was to tell the teacher to keep a 2x4 at the desk and threaten him with that when he needed to. :giggle:

My dad's solution when my brother was having problems like that was to tell the teacher to keep a 2x4 at the desk and threaten him with that when he needed to. :giggle:Yeah...I'm guessing A's teacher won't go for that, much as she'd like to! :heee:

Thanks for the reassurance. I didn't grow up around boys so I'm feeling a little lost w/ what's normal and what's not.

I am pretty sure that no good doctor would consider diagnosing ADD or ADHD until the age of 8. Before that, they are just kids being kids.

From other descriptions of Aidan, he focuses well when he wants to (or needs to). I am pretty sure that a child with ADD/ADHD would not be able to handle things like a hockey practice or baseball game.

From other descriptions of Aidan, he focuses well when he wants to (or needs to). I am pretty sure that a child with ADD/ADHD would not be able to handle things like a hockey practice or baseball game.

This is not exactly true. Even kids who have AD/HD can focus when It's something they are intertested in. Jack has no problems in school when they doing things he like to do, it's getting him to focus on stuff he's not interested in that's the problem.

But, altogether (and keep in mind I am not a doctor or an expert :awink: )It sounds like Aiden is a pretty typical 6 yo, maybe a little immature, but that doesn't mean AD/HD. If you have any other questions, just let me know.

From the time I spend in the classroom, it seems that Aidan's behavior is typical of that of many boys of that age, in that grade. I see that stuff all. the. time. And seeing as how the teacher is constantly correcting those kids, it must not be sinking in w/ them, either. :lol:

Ditto to Karri (minus the classroom time - I hear Matthew's account of his day and everyone's behavior for the day :lol: ). Sounds typical to me too :nod:

Alyssa - Is he a younger one in his class?
Josh showed similar things in kindergarten and we did the evaluation for ADHD having his teacher fill it out, us, and then the ped looked at. He was borderline and they said it should come with age..and he started K at 5 1/2, BUT all the other kids are at least 6 months older. Each year he got a little bit better..and I would say if he listens to the teacher and stops, that he's able to control things, I was under the impression that the ADHD just keep going, whether its tapping the foot or something like that. But there are others that may be able to give better info. Even now, at 10, I see a big maturity difference, but each year has gotten better and he hasn't had any problems at school. Austin is 6 1/2 now and in K and I would say the kids in there do ALL Of the same things as you are mentioning, the teacher even said right now, its like they are regressing to the first days of school!!! So that could be it too, maybe they are just ready for summeR???

With Jacob, he would stop the behavior when told, but would sometimes go back to it after a few minutes or maybe even a couple of hours. With him it wasn't like he'd forget he couldn't say tap his pencil on his desk (for example) but that he just had to do it to let out some energy. (make sense??)

You could talk to your pediatrician if you are concerned, and they can give a screening if it would make you feel better. I think Aidan is not even close to it, but just being a boy. Ah, boys are wonderful......




And children with ADHD can focus if they are constantly redirected to their activity. Karate was really hard for Jacob at first, but he's total focus when he's there. Not so much at home.......

Alyssa you just described David to a T. I think it's just a normal 6 yo boy. Then again, I am not a doctor, but I do play one on tv. :giggle:

thanks...like I said, I have no experience w/ boys and I just keep hearing from my mom how different we girls were. :dunno:

We sent Aidan to transitional 1st grade for the immaturity reason, so no - he's not the youngest in his class. Well, actually - he is nearly the youngest. But when he goes to regular 1st grade and for the rest of his schooling, he'll be one of the oldest, by design. But - most of the kids in his class are also in there for immaturity reasons, so...that can't really help him learn from others, can it?! Oh, that poor teacher and the patience she must have!

You have described Alex to a tee. He is still only in kindergarten and his teacher must constantly re-direct him to focus on the task at hand. I mentioned ADD/ADHD to her during Parent-teacher conference and she said he is just a normal boy. The girls tend to have better focus earlier but boys will be boys. She said to get the thought of ADD out of my head now. She has received specialized training to recognize true symptoms of ADD/ADHD and Alex doesn't have it. Makes me feel better......sort of......until he acts wild and goofy. :pullhair:

Alyssa, I think Aidan being the eldest of your boys is a major factor too. Just seeing my other boys going through the stages and how much more advanced they are and have matured faster than Aiden did tells me that the fact he is the first child he has had nothing to base his levels on, but with Riley and Jacob they have an older sibling to aspire to and therefore have reached there faster.

I watch Aiden play with his school friends at parties and they are all a bunch of energy explosive fools, boys will be boys. :awink:

I do agree though that if you have major concern then there is no harm in getting him tested.

Alyssa, I think Aidan being the eldest of your boys is a major factor too. Just seeing my other boys going through the stages and how much more advanced they are and have matured faster than Aiden did tells me that the fact he is the first child he has had nothing to base his levels on, but with Riley and Jacob they have an older sibling to aspire to and therefore have reached there faster. Oh, absolutely. And he's rarely around older kids so he's also got little to base that on.

As a mom of a boy/an elementary teacher, I think the behaviors you described, Alyssa, are normal. I've taught older grades (2-5) but based on that experience, Aidan sounds like a typical kid. For me, what stood out, is that his teacher said he will respond to a warning. The kids that I've taught who have ADHD very often could not stop. I think it's that inability to control the impulse, even though a child often is aware and WANTS to stop, that leans to ADHD(not in isolation, of course, but with additional indicators). My thought is that it's his maturity right now, but you'll see a difference next year when he's put in a different group of kids, most of whom will be younger. I think that's what I've noticed with Steve- the youngest in his class last year, the oldest in his class this year. He'll be amongst the oldest from here on in. I remember last year, at the Mother's Day Tea, that Steve was the one during circle/singing to the moms, that was swinging his arms, being silly, flipping up the corners of the rug, generally being the kid that needs to be told to stop what he's doing. Believe me, I know it can be concerning, but I don't think, from my own experience, that you should worry.

I am pretty sure that no good doctor would consider diagnosing ADD or ADHD until the age of 8. Before that, they are just kids being kids.

From other descriptions of Aidan, he focuses well when he wants to (or needs to). I am pretty sure that a child with ADD/ADHD would not be able to handle things like a hockey practice or baseball game.

True Sheila. Most doctors have told me they will not consider diagnosing before age 7.

Kareem was diagnosed with ADD when he was 8 or 9. We also completed a form, as did his teacher. Kareem did not display enough of the characteristics, and his doctor had a difficult time making a definitive diagnosis. Kareem had mostly As and Bs, his test scores were above average, and he had the ability to concentrate for hours on things he was interested in (literally, like taking my dad's laptop apart and putting it back together correctly). Also, Kareem was never never aggresive or hyperactive.

However, Kareem did not pay attention in class...he did a lot of talking during classwork time. And he also sharpened his pencil a lot too. He was not finishing his classwork in school, and ended up bringing a lot of it home to finish on a regular basis. His teachers was insistent that something was amiss, and I finally gave in.

I always thought that a child with ADD/ADHD could not pick and chose what he wanted to concentrate on...I thought they just didn't have the ability to do it, even if they wanted to. His doctor claimed this wasn't true.

Years later another doctor told me that Kareem did not have ADD. He said that if spending 4-5 hours deeply concentrating on things you love, but then not concentrating on things you did not love suggested ADD, then half the adult population has ADD. Then again, Kareem is now 12, so maybe he grew out of it? :dunno:

Unfortunately, there isn't a definitive test for ADD/ADHD, so any diagnosis is subjective.