Another annoying eBay situation (that you are all probably sick of hearing about)

[MrsPeacefrog]

Ok, I have another situation happening that I am just floored about, and thought I would throw it to you guys so that you can give me your judgement on it. I can't see where I am wrong, nor that I deserved the email I got, I am in such shock that I have not yet responded and am unsure of what to say.


Ok, basic scenerio.

A lady bought an item off me. A week passed and no payment, I lodged an unpaid item dispute, and after another 7 days going by with no contact I was about to just get a credit from eBay when she emailed me. Here is our conversation and the ultimate finale that I am stumped over!

Hello Deborah, I have been sick and was unable to pay, but I will be making payment in the next week or so. I will email you as soon as payment has been made. Ms X

Hello Ms X, I am sorry to hear you have been sick. I was about to lodge a credit with eBay for the final value fee, but as you have contacted me, I will wait to do that for the rest of the week so you have a chance to make payment. Thank you. Deborah, Aidley Co.

Deborah, Thank you so much for your understanding, I will let you know once payment has been made. Ms X


Now another 1.5 weeks pass and I email her one last time

Hello Ms X. I am presuming you are either still sick or will not be paying, I will give you 2 more days from the date of this email and if no contact has been made I will just lodge the FVF credit through eBay. Deborah, Aidley Co.

Deborah, sorry, I have still be sick but payment will be made tomorrow

Thank you.


Payment was finally made 3.5 weeks after original purchase date.

I sent her a payment received email, then posted out her item the next day, and gave her a postage notice.

I don't hear anything for a week, then I get this email last friday.

I have not received my scales as yet and paid for them over a week ago!!!!!

I was not happy with that, I found it to be extremely harsh after I was so patient for the last month waiting for her payment. So this was my response.

Ms X,
I posted your scales out immediately. On the 19th of January. I have the paperwork proving I posted it to you.

I am offended by the amount of exclamation marks you used in your email to me, I think I have been extremely patient waiting for your payment which took over 3 weeks and I never once demanded you to make immediate payment or did I make any threats, and if the parcel has been lost by Australia post I will do everything I can to get it traced, I promise you that, you will have to be patient though as you did not pay for registered post it's going to take them a bit to find it.

I posted it to:

Ms X
PO Box xx
XXXXXX NSW XXX.

Please in the mean time check with your local post office and see if they have it there, in the past we have had parcels sitting in post office's under other items unclaimed.

Thank you.

Deborah



And THIS is the response I got from her tonight, I am gob smacked!

Listen Deb

I have learned that people act they way they do for a reason.
You take a look at my history on ebay it is perfect, no complaints.
I have never purchased something and not paid for it like I did with you and
do want to know why
I didnt pay for it straight away, thats because I am sick with cancer!!!!!!!
and I have just buried my husband with the same thing and let me tell you
something, paying a pissy bill for 30.00 just doesnt even register when you
have been that close to death. I watched my husband take his last breath
after nursing him in our home for 8 months and rushing to give him oxygen or
pain killers, so dont bother giving me your shit about how I have upset you
sweetheart, I paid it, yes it was late but I paid for it and had every
bloody intention of doing so, but I had to wait until I was well enough.
Cancer takes your energy but I am glad that I stored it enough now to write
this email to you, you bitch.!!! For the record I havent receivedit, so
stick it where the sun dont shine!!!


:woa:


I didn't deserve that did I?

I am so angry over this. I am not a mind reader, how I am supposed to know these things.

Was I out of line with my email to her? or is she just a bitter nasty peice of work.

Would you respond? would you tell her where to go, or be totally sympathetic to her situation?

[Cami]

Deb, she's freaky.

Just to satisfy my own curiousity, I'd look at her recent history to see what else she's been spending her time buying while her poor dear husband was on his deathbed.

I don't think you have anything to gain by continuing to communicate with her. I'd send her a very neutral message, saying that you're sorry for her troubles and that she simply needs to be patient and give the mail service time to deliver her package.

And hopefully you won't hear from her again.

[MrsPeacefrog]

:lol: Cami, I just looked at her history, and she has bought mainly house items like fridges, dining room tables, rugs etc.

:gah: I can't believe she called me a bitch. I just literally can not believe it! Talk about letting out all her anger on the wrong person!

[Clare]

:woa:

Someone's just a wee bit bitter and twisted, don't ya think? :rolleyes:

I wouldn't respond and hope she doesn't give you neg feedback!

[TtownAnne]

Don't answer - it's only going to turn into a pissing contest. Stay quiet, hope her scales get there soon.

[Melissa]

I wouldn't answer either, I might report her to ebay though.

[AmyLynn]

I know you are worried about losing your 100% feedback, but I think you should file a complaint based on the verbage in her last email.

[AmyP]

Wow, Deb, that's harsh (on her part)! How on earth were you supposed to know she had cancer? And part of me says she's making that up. :dunno: I agree with Amy that you should file a complaint with ebay based on the verbage of that last e-mail.

[Melissa]

You know, if she is so sick, how did she muster the energy to buy all of these things? :hug99: You didn't deserve any of the crap she gave you.

[Nadine]

Sorry about the harsh and undeserved email. Either ignore it or complain against her verbal abuse.

[Hannabanana]

I agree with everyone else -- she was out of line.

Btw, what was she buying from you? If she's so sick, why would she be spending money at this time of her life?

[gulp!]

Wow, Deb. Either she obviously needed to unload on someone, or she's just a troll. You couldn't have known all of that, and you know it, so don't waste anymore time or energy letting this woman work you up. I agree, I don't think I'd reply to her.

[Sandy]

I agree w/ the posts about not bothering to reply. Either she did just go through all what she went through, and was venting (still not an excuse and was totally improper) OR, she is a troll and does this stuff for kicks and giggles. Which would be pathetic. So, no, you totally didn't deserve that email at all IMO, but to avoid a pissing contest, I would just let it be.

[Bonnie]

I wouldn't answer either... you were very patient with her late payment and very professional in your initial response. She went ballistic on you and obviously has some anger issues. The only thing I might do, is if it isn't too time consuming, see if you can trace the package just to make sure it gets to her, because if it does not, you will likely have some problems with this lady.

[pam]

She's a doozy! I have to wonder whether she's responding to this? I am offended by the amount of exclamation marks you used in your email to me That's the only thing that you said that I think could be taken wrong. I think she got angry at you for calling her on her crap & she was probably procrastinating on paying. I wouldn't feed into the stuff going on in her life since that's not your job. I would focus on what is your job (her purchase & what you need to do at this point) & not address anything else. Definitely complain to ebay if she continues to be inappropriate.

[Irish Luck]

Deb, you didn't deserve that email from her, regrardless of what is going on in her life. I'd report it to ebay so they can keep a check on it and make sure she is not doing it other people.

[Shanna]

Ugh. Some people are just idiots. I don't think she should've talked to you that way and I think you have been OVERLY patient with her :dunno:

[MrsPeacefrog]

:hug99: Thanks guys.

Ultimately as much as I am annoyed at the way she has treated me after I was so patient with her, my biggest concern is the 100% feedback.

I do need to get over it and realise that sooner or later I will get a negative. I think it's impossible not to. But I do want to try to avoid it :crazy: :lol:

I think I am going to take your advice and report her, if it gives me the negative then I will live with that. I didn't need to be dumped on like that, the :devil: in me wants to reply and say to her "Well I am a widow of 5 children all under 10, so that pathetic $30 you are talking about is the difference between a nights meal for my kids or no meal, but of course you think you are the only person in the world with problems so I apologise for trying to demand the same respect and patience from you that I extended"

But of course I won't. It will turn into a pissing contest like you said.

Pam, yes I believe she is responding to that statement. I was trying to point out to her that in all my correspondence with her, I never once sounded demanding or impatient. Her response to me with all those exclamation marks was pushy demanding and impatient and I didn't deserve that after all the patience I gave her.

Aimee: She bought these bathroom scales off me

http://i19.ebayimg.com/02/i/04/21/8e/3d_1_sbl.JPG

[Jillian]

I read it all, and I definitely think her e-mail to you was totally undeserved and rude.

But I have a question... How much more energy does it take to make a payment than to send an e-mail? I mean seriously? I would understand the I'm sick excuse much better if it was that she was late in sending you something, not paying you for something...

[Cazzle]

To be fair, she's probably in a rush to get the scales so she can weigh that enormous chip on her shoulder.

This lady doesn't just have issues, she has a subscription, and she should not have taken it out on you. It might be an interesting game to see if you can shame her into politeness by reacting to her rudeness with incredible politeness yourself... or just put the barest minimum effort into getting her off your back and out of your life, and breathe a sigh of relief that you never need interact with her again!

I don't want to call her a bitch, but if it barks like a dog...

[Joan]

OMG Deb! That is just freaky, creepy, and weird. You didn't deserve that at all. I think not responding will drive her crazy. She is probably just dying to get another email from you so she can respond in a crazy way.

[Kristen]

You can always rebut a negative. I wouldn't leave her feedback until the last possible minute (what's the time limit?) I would be tempted to leave neutral or negative due to lack of communication and late payment. Maybe if you leave it late in the game, she won't have time to give you negative (if she doesn't do it immediately.) Does she have any negatives?

[MrsPeacefrog]

:lol2: Carol.

:hug99: thanks guys for continue to confirm my intial thoughts.

She doesn't have any negatives, but I am sure if she continues this behaviour it won't be long before she gets one.

I was just reading up on reporting someone for rude emails and it seems that if it's done outside of the eBay system there isn't much they can do, she sent this email direct to my email, not through eBay's message system, so I don't think there is much I can do.

I did think the same way as Carol for a brief moment about being so overly nice to her that it would make her feel as small as an ant, but ultimately I doubt that would work. :rolleyes:

I will let you know if she leaves me a negative. :errr:

[Bridget]

Be nice/ignore her like everyone here is saying, but say all the rude things here that you'd *like* to say to her. Then you get to vent, but without worrying she will hunt you down and make you into a lady suit. (I hope she goes away - what a nutjob.)

:biggrin:

[indie24]

What a crazy woman.

[Lyoshka]

woa, that is totally out of line! I'd just let it go, otherwise it will just get worse... sorry you got dumped on like this, Deb! Totally undeserved!

[~Deborah~]

:jawdrop: I wouldn't reply to her.
YOU are the bigger person and do not stoop to her level of ignorance!
If she has enough energy to post that nasty email to you then she has enough energy to pay you. WTF?

Hope it gets resolved. :bighug:

Can you send that email to ebay. I am sure that has to break some ebay law:dunno:

[MrsPeacefrog]

Well I responded :lol: Against all your advice :blush:

I am hopeless I just couldn't help myself.

This is what I wrote.

>All I was saying to you was that I sent it, I was nice to you the whole >way. I do not know your situation, and I am just a stay at home mother with
>3 young boys under 4 who uses this as a way to help me afford to stay home instead >of working fulltime.
>I do not know
>you, nor your situation. There is no way to know these things. All I know
>is that people in the past have purchased things and not paid and even
>though I have been dicked around in the past, I try to remain polite and
>patient with my customers, like I thought I was doing with you. I extended
>you my sympathies when you told me you were sick. I didn't push you, and
>when you did pay I posted your item immediately. I was shocked when I
>received your email and felt offended after I was so patient with you but
>you couldn't extend me the same respect.

>This is obviously an issue with Australia post. I have lodged the form for a lost parcel >and they will get back to me once they have located the item.

>I refuse to believe I am the bitch you think I am, and frankly I did not deserve the
>the way you spoke to me. I do not want this to be a back and forth email war, the
>only reason I am responding is because I value my business and made a promise to
>see every sale out to the end and leave with the customer feeling satisfied that I >have done everything in my power to acheive that.

>I will let you know when I hear from Australia post, in the meantime I hope you re->read the email you sent me and work out whether it was called for.



I couldn't believe I hit send. I decided that I am probably getting a negative from her anyway so what harm would it cause.

Well I got a reply. And this is it

ok, Thanks. I will let you know if it arrives in the meantime

:woa:

She is a complete nut!

[Cazzle]

Ooh yeah, that confirms it. She's a slinky all right.

[Nichole]

What a freak job! :screwy:

[Shanna]

Whoa!

But, that was a very straightforward and blunt response to her :aok: Completely deserved, IMO :lol:

She is teh sux. :nod:

[Denden]

You're much TOO nice for this psycho customer! :biggrin: I hope she gets her scale so maybe that will rid her of some of her nastiness.

[Kathryn]

Deb- I was just reading this... wow- you are a better person than Me :lol: So have you heard back from her?

[AmyP]

Yup, definitely a nutcase. I'm sorry you have to deal with her.

[Joan]

Well I am quite impressed at how you worded that email! You were detailed and with out drama or emotion. Hope the scales show up so you are rid of her!

[Mandi]

Damn she's crazy, Deb. :lol: I'm sorry you're dealing with her. Hopefully she'll get her scale and STFU!

[Melissa]

Actually, I kind of hope the scales don't show up and she's screwed out of the money but that is just the :devil: in me. Anyway, I liked your response. She's a complete whack job!