I hate it when people say I have plenty of time because I am only 23...25 ---- whatever :complain:

Amen....:clap:

I agree!!! I would like to be done having children at a young age and that is my personal choice!

I hate when people say "Just relax and it will happen" since I am constantly stressing over TTC/Infertility. :angrywife: stupid people!

I hate when people say "Just relax and it will happen" since I am constantly stressing over TTC/Infertility. :angrywife: stupid people!That one is my personal favorite too Brandi. Although, I also like "It will happen when it's supposed too", "maybe now isn't the right time for you all" and "maybe what you need is a month without the medicine".

"maybe now isn't the right time for you all"
:angrywife Grrr.......

I hate it when people assume that we aren't close to trying, let alone trying. They might say something like, "When are YOU having children, you better get on it, we were pregnant but the time we were married as long as you are" I am not going to tell them all the details of our TTC history...but they assume we aren't even thinking about it.

Then on the flip side, if I answer, "Sometime" to when we will be TTC they will say something like, "Oh you have lots of time, wait 3 years that is the best amount of time" Very annoying!!!

I truly hate when people say "relax" ... ***insert violent thoughts here***.

:lol: YES Julie I get that

:lol2: @ Sept bride

what drives me nuts is when people say "well you'll understand when YOU have kids". I'm not even sure we will be able to, and this drives me CRAZY!

My favorite question is "When are you going to have kids?" My new comback is I'm a little busy today, maybe tomorrow :lol2:

Of course if I told family and friends we were trying they would probably say "Oh your young yet, you still have time" :lol2: Its a no win situation

I hate really hate, when discussing infertility when people say "relax and it will happen" or they say "there is nothing wrong, it's all in your head".

I also hate the you're young you still have time crap. I am 21 and graduating from college in 2004 and have been married for 2 years. I think i am adult enough to make decisions on my own :rolleyes:

People do say the stupidist things....when we were starting IF treatments, people would say, 'oh, my friend took a fertility pill/shot, why not try that'..like there's one magic pill or shot for all of us and poof you're pg...they just have no clue what we have to go through with IF..I hate that people say 'WHEN are you having kids?' as if everyone can if they want to..many of us want to and can't....

allie

I hate really hate, when discussing infertility when people say "relax and it will happen" .
This is my biggest pet peeve! I don't know how many people have said something along those lines to me. Several people have said "I knew a couple who went through all kinds of medical infertility treatments. They took a break one month and just relaxed and they got pregnant naturally." As if all it takes to get pregnant is to relax. People who say that have obviously never struggled with infertility!:rolleyes:

I absolutely HATE when people tell me to just relax...... Okay so when will relaxing make my retarded ovaries decide to release an egg that Daniel's completely dumb "boys" swim towards that egg rather than just not do anything? ARGGHH!! Sorry but that just grates my nerves especially with the fact that 80% of the women on my father's side of the family have had full hysterectomies by the time they were 27.

totaly agree with all of you ladies!!

The one that really got me was...first let me set the scene. I've been ttc for over four years. My sis wasn't even trying and got pg right away. I had a hard time with it, but it got easier over the 9 months. She asked me to be in the room when she delivered. So, here we are..all sitting around the hospital room. She's sitting on the bed, her husband is sitting beside her holding her hand and I'm standing behind her rubbing her back. My parents and dh are sitting in chairs around the room. Well, here comes the nurse..a nice lady that my mom and dh know. She starts talking to dh...somewhere in the conversation it came out that we are having trouble ttc and really want a baby. So, she pipes up and says (while laughing) "Oh, I'm the opposite of you. I always tell people that all my husband has to do is drop his pants and I'm pregnant!" :jawdrop: I felt like saying "DIDN'T YOU JUST HEAR ME SAY I AM HAVING TROULBE?!?!?!":banghead:


My parents comment to me (when I first found out sis was pg) was that it was my duty to take her everywhere (dr appts, baby shopping, ect.) and basically to stop being silly! :argue:

I'm the only one (other than one of my Aunts) that has had trouble ttc...so they just don't understand!

Sorry to ramble on like this...

Another one is when your "friend" knows your struggling and have been struggling with ttc and she comes up pg. You tell her your happy..blah blah..anyway, all she wants to do is talk about her pregnancy and baby..then after a long time of that, you mention that it hurts when she does that and she tells you that your wrong and basically selfish for feeling the way you do.

Okay..I'm done..I promise! :lol:

I hate hearing people say "maybe theres something wrong with you" cause i didnt get pg after once month of being OTL!

Okay I got the best one the other day from DH's ex ( she goes to the same church). We went out last weekend and she said something about not having a babysitter ( she has 2 girls). I said something going out, she said that that would stop when I have kids. Umm, I don't go out often and 2nd I have friends and a crazy MIL who will watch my child. ARGH!! That just completely peeved me off and then the kicker was when I said something about starting IF treatments this year and that I wished it was just easier to have kids. The stupid one then mentions that she was married in Sept, stopped BCP's and found out she was pg in Oct. I looked at her sarcastically and said let me cry her a river.... her comeback, yeah but I had to have a c-section!! WTF???!!!>>> How in the heck does that compare??? I muttered that I would take a c-section to be able to have a baby. Needless to say I left soon after that.

:eek: Oh, I am so sorry she was like that! I can't believe some people!! :rolleyes:

I hate the "relax" comments too. It's so annoying. Like if I don't know to relax on my own, you constantly reminding me isn't going to help me relax! Another comment I hear often is always about someone's friend or friend's friend who quickly got PG while TAB! Good for her. But DH and I have TAB and guess what still no baby. So thanks for your advice but NO THANKS!

Anna

Just reading this thread made me think of things... We tried for a year to get pregnant with #2. I had people telling me I should be happy that I already have a healthy child. I was told to relax. And the kicker.... I had the nurse practioner that I saw because we had been trying for a year ask me why I wanted to bother with temping and infertility treatments. Excuse me.... I want another baby!!!

There are some majorily insensitive people in this world!!!
I was at church last night. I was talking to my mom and "Aunt" (old family friend) when my dad walked up. I hadn't told him about my appt.( I just called yesterday morning and set up my first appt...which is a HUGE thing! Have been battling IF for about 4.5 years now and hadn't been to the dr since 2001), so I really quickly told him that I made one and the date. She asked why I was going to the dr..was it because I'm pg? I said no, but that is why I'm going to help with that problem. Then my mom told her something (probably that I'm having trouble). She (my "Aunt" ) started laughing and told me that I was "doing it wrong". She said nine months and one day after she got married she had her first child. http://www.ultimatebaby.com/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif I could have screamed! I just said goodbye and walked away:(

now that i am pg, and no one knows but dh, everyone keeps saying "any kids yet" and when i say not yet, they says "your smart to wait, your life will be over" :grr:

You know, I have heard most of these- "Just relax, it will happen." "It will happen when it's supposed to happen." "Be grateful for the one you have" etc etc etc. The thing that bothers me the most about it is that they ALL come from my MOTHER! When I came back from my HSG and found out I had no blockages, I was really upset because it meant we still didn't know what was going on. My mom has the gaul to say she understands what I am going through. I wanted to scream at her! I am the oldest of four and she miscarried before she got pg with me. All but one of us were accidents-she only tried for one! All of us are two years apart. So no, she has NO IDEA what I am going through, she has never come close to having to experience unexplained secondary infertility. What it's like to cry at the end of a comedy because they showed baby pictures in the credits (sorry, I am just getting over that experience from last night)

I empathize Kim. I HATE when people who have no idea what you are going through say they understand. It just makes me want to scream. Before we had Riley (I tried for almost 2 years to get him..and now we are experiencing the whole thing again) anytime I would get upset and cry or anything in front of my mom she would say "You think this is hard for you? I may not get grandkids!" WTF is that all about...?!?!

:hug99: Here's hoping you figure out something soon!

anytime I would get upset and cry or anything in front of my mom she would say "You think this is hard for you? I may not get grandkids!"
I'm so sorry she said that :hug99: I can only imagine how that must have hurt :(

I couldn't agree more with all these. I heard them ALL when we were TTC. :rolleyes: What annoys me even more is when people would say "you'll change your mind when you have kids" and now that I have a child, I hear "just wait until she *fill in the blank*" Ugh!!! Don't presume to tell me how I will feel differently......EVER!!!

The one that I'm really hating right now is...Why do you want to get pg again??? and.... Ya know..you don't do pregnant very well!...And then when I told my mom that I wanted to lose weight before we TTC again..she said to me...here..have a cookie!! WTF???????

I had a preemie 7 months ago(she was 3.5 mon early) and everyone thinks I should stop with her!

BTW, Ashleigh....I see you are going to name your DD Sophie and she's due on 9/30/04....my DD name is Sophia and she was born on 9/30/03! Neat!!

april: I was just reading your sig and thinking about the irony of it. A girl I used to be friends with, don't really see her anymore, stole our name and is naming her daughter sofia. we dont see her so if we have a girl she will still be sophie, but the girl that stole the name, her name is paige, lol.

That would be so wierd if i had the baby on my due date...kinda freaky :bolt:

I have been dealing w/ IF for 3 years or so and I hate the age comments, I hate hearing "oh you have time you're only 22". Like it hurts any less at 22 than at 32, there is not a switch that you can your "maternal instinct" or whatever off. My desire to be a mom is so strong that only having a child will make it better.

Another one I hate is "Maybe this is God's way of telling you it's not time, or you won't be a good mother, etc". I always come up with, but it's God's will for a 14 year old to get pregnant and throw their child in a garbage can. UGH! I hate that...especially when they think that IF treatments are wrong...I come back with well God must have created the intelligence and technology, so shut your pie hole.

Sorry for ranting, but people are idiots and should just shut their mouths unless they know how you are feeling.

I have been dealing w/ IF for 3 years or so and I hate the age comments, I hate hearing "oh you have time you're only 22". Like it hurts any less at 22 than at 32, there is not a switch that you can your "maternal instinct" or whatever off. My desire to be a mom is so strong that only having a child will make it better.

Another one I hate is "Maybe this is God's way of telling you it's not time, or you won't be a good mother, etc". I always come up with, but it's God's will for a 14 year old to get pregnant and throw their child in a garbage can. UGH! I hate that...especially when they think that IF treatments are wrong...I come back with well God must have created the intelligence and technology, so shut your pie hole.

Sorry for ranting, but people are idiots and should just shut their mouths unless they know how you are feeling.
:hug99: Even when people have been where you are, it's still hard to find the right things to say, especially if they have already been successful. It doesn't matter if it took them 10 years. I hope you are able to get PG soon!!!

Thanks Andrea...I totally understand. It just makes me upset you know... I'll eventually get over my bitterness...LOl

Thanks Andrea...I totally understand. It just makes me upset you know... I'll eventually get over my bitterness...LOl
I just re-read my post, and I'm not sure it makes sense. I just know when I was going through IF (not NEAR as long as you) I felt the same way you do. I never thought I'd get over it (and I'm not sure I have to be honest). It's hard for someone who's been through it to say the right things. It's near impossible for someone who has never experienced it to say the right thing!!

I just re-read my post, and I'm not sure it makes sense. I just know when I was going through IF (not NEAR as long as you) I felt the same way you do. I never thought I'd get over it (and I'm not sure I have to be honest). It's hard for someone who's been through it to say the right things. It's near impossible for someone who has never experienced it to say the right thing!!
That is so true I have learned now by going through this that when people are going through a tough time, maybe just give them a hug and *LISTEN* to them. So many people are always so quick to spout their opinions without really listening to the other person. Someone always had a friend that did this and did that, but in the process of telling you about their friend they lose sight that this is YOUR problem and they are really not being there for you.

Okay, I really don't know if that made any sense at all, but hopefully ya'll understand.

What about the "you're way too young to be having kids" spill. I alwasy want to follow up with "Okay, dad."

UGH...know what you mean...I get you're only 22, you've got plenty of time...err just shut you're piehole arlready.