Okay this is it!!! I am OVER IT :angry2:

Riley has sent me over the edge this morning!!! I am so flippin sick of him sticking his hand in his nappy when he does a poo and wiping it on things! :pullhair: anywhere from the walls, to his clothes, to the bed sheets.

We have been encouraging PT, at daycare (which he goes twice a week) he will wee on the potty but no poo's as of yet a few weekends ago I took the nappy off him the entire weekend and he did wee a few times but mostly wet himself the entire weekend. I then hurt my back and couldn't run after him so we had to put the nappy back on him (I know not a good message)

Now this morning he came into my bedroom waking me up to show me that he did a poo and he had wiped it all over the front of his PJ's and the wall next to his bed, so not only do I have to clean up the mess that is on him but wash down the wall AND strip the bed sheets! all before 7am! I am sooooo unimpressed!:banghead:

I got so angry at him and told him that he is NEVER wearing a nappy again, he is a big boy now and he is learning to use the potty this weekend.

I feel so guilty because he has been crying for his nappy for about 30 minutes now, he is settling down but he is still upset.

I am just so fricken sick of this! he is 3 at the end of September. Aiden wasn't PT'd until just on 3, with him we just told him there were no more nappies and after wetting himself a few times he got it and started peeing and pooping on the toilet.

I don't know why this isn't working with Riley, he says he wants to be a baby like Jacob not a big boy like Aiden. I have tried the stickers, reward system, telling him he will be a big boy like Aiden, offering to buy him superman undies (his favourite character at the moment) telling him if he PT's then Santa will bring him a bike... nothing is working.

NOT Pting him is NOT an option, I refuse to keep washing his poo streaks off things, its DISGUSTING! I have never seen anything so revolting, Aiden NEVER did this! :disbelief

I NEED HELP! what am I doing wrong! I don't know what to do :blue:

No advice just lots of :hug99:

I really don't have any advice either but I can imagine how nuts you must be. Cleaning up pee is bad enough.

Have you talked to him about how he can't reach into his diaper? Why does he say he does that? Is he just trying to clean it up? I think I'd tell him he can have a diaper to poop in only if he doesn't touch it. Although I'm sure you've gone through all this already. And that won't help with potty training. But I'd just want to get rid of the messy poo everywhere.

I hope someone has some advice that helps.

:hug99:

:hug99: I'm a firm believer in not pushing PTing but to follow the child's lead. I've never had the smearing poop problem though :dunno: Any chance you can get some help from your parents this weekend with the other boys so you can concentrate fully on toilet training Riley?

We used to duct tape Saxon's diaper on. ALso get one piece clothes so they can't go down the back. Isn't it cold there now? How about footed pajamas? This was how I dealt as well as checking on him constantly to catch him before he did it.

I was where you are now. It is not forever but I know how gross it is! :puke:

:hug99:

See, I would think maybe you SHOULD push the PTing because he's obviously aware enough of what's going on that it bothers him and he's trying to remove it. But I also like the duct-taping idea should you choose to forego the potty.

I was going to suggest the duct tape but I got the impression that you want to get rid of the nappies totally :dunno: If you're going to stick with nappies, it's not a bad idea :nod:

Man, Deb. :hug99: I don't know what to tell you....... :hug99:

I'm curious what advice someone might give you with regard to PT though. Alex is doing the same thing with wanting to wear diapers like a baby instead of big boy pants. :( I just keep putting the diapers on him and hoping he'll come around one of these days! Alex is almost exactly a month younger than Riley......

As for the poo.....I'll just be praying that it stops VERY soon. :hug99: That really sucks ass, Deb. :(

Holy shmoly, Deb! That really stinks (sorry, pun intended)..... I feel for you, and hope it stops soon! No advice, just lots and lots of hugs for you, girl!:hug99: :hug99: :hug99:

Oh you poor girl having to deal with such a mess...and so early in the am! I've heard of kids doing this before so unfortunately it's not that uncommon. I think mine may have done it by accident at some point but TG they didn't start a habit of it. It must be so difficult to deal with!

I was also going to suggest a one piece outfit of some sort where it would not be possible for him to get at the poo. Like a T-shirt onesie with pants (and possibly duct tape if he goes in through the leg holes of the onesie). The footie PJ's are also a great idea. Is that an option at all? I know it would mean some adjustment but to me it might more difficult than trying to PT him if he's not really ready. It may mean cleaning poo out of underwear (and still walls and paws) instead of changing diapers :dunno:

Does he have a favorite toy or activity you could put in time out for a few hours when he reaches in the diaper? Taking toys away always had a big effect on my kids. Or possibly a sticker chart where he could earn a sticker for each time (or each day) he did not reach into the diaper?

If you think he is ready to toiled train (he knows when he poos and it bothers him and he can control it, etc) then maybe you should try for a few days but honestly if he doesn't take to it, I would try to prevent him from getting into his diaper rather than push PTing.

Also, I know how you feel about the situation (and how we all would feel) but how do you react? Is there any chance that he is feeding off the negative attention he gets by doing this? I forget about stuff like this and at times my mom will remind me how powerful a 2 year old must feel when they are single-handedly able to make their mother hysterical. :lol: Not saying you are hysterical but he may feel a sense of power by controllling you like that.

I was going to suggest duct tape too.
I'd have him in a onesie and pants with feet and have them duct-taped together at the waist.

First, omg, you get a big fat hug. That is not a fun experience in the least.

My advice: Alex didn't PT until a month before her 3rd birthday. No amount of rewards/discussions/anything was going to change it. So, I'm gonna agree with Clare (good golly again!) and say I don't advocate pushing PT. They will do it when they will do it. And forcing the issue will just drive you NUTS!! I like the duct tape and onsie ideas for containing the poop. GROSS!!

That said, if you are going to PT him, I like the idea too of sending the other boys off ot a grandparents/friends so that you can concentrate on him. :nod:

I forget about stuff like this and at times my mom will remind me how powerful a 2 year old must feel when they are single-handedly able to make their mother hysterical. :lol: Not saying you are hysterical but he may feel a sense of power by controllling you like that.

Oh no you can say I am hysterical! :lol: I used to be very calm about it, and tell him how it is yucky, dirty and we don't do things like that, I the moved up to putting him into time out, then I started taking his favourite toys off him, nothing seems to stop him, I expressed how he just needs to tell me when there is a poop in there and I will change it straight away for him. :dunno: But this morning after waking up to that I did just lose it, I yelled at him and just declared that he is not a baby and he is not to wear nappies anymore, I feel terrible for it, but I was at my wits end and just lost it :blue:

Either way I am taking some of your advice and I am dedicating myself to PTing this weekend, we will not go out and just do it, if by Monday morning (daycare day) he has not taken to it then I will have to try the onsies or duct tape! :nod:

So this morning after he settled down from me taking his nappies away, I sat him down and told him that he is a big boy like Aiden and that he is going to go potty. I put him in undies and long pants and kept reminding him he needed to tell me when he had to go. He wet his pants about an hour later, I again reinforced the fact he has to go potty and changed him. About 45 minutes after that he wet himself again, so I again reinforced the potty for him and put put him in pants again. Then just before his nap I told him that if he does a wee on the potty he can wear the buzz lightyear pullups to bed like Aiden does. He sat on the potty and did a wee :ura1: okay I know it was only once, but it's a start! He is now asleep with the pull up on and when he wakes I am going to take it straight off him and see what happens in the afternoon.

I just can't believe kids do this! :puke:

One wee is a start! :lol:

When I was actively PTing E & H, I would set the oven timer for every 15 minutes and sit them on the toilet every time it went off. They didn't go every time but it lessened the accidents and meant that they didn't have to remember to tell me every time at first.

Good luck with the pullups at naptime. I can't let Sam wear them to bed b/c they're not as absorbent as nappies and end up leaking everywhere.

Well it seems that Riley might have to be one of those, Clare. When I PT'd Aiden after a few accidents in the morning, he just started to go potty when he needed to go, and that was the end of it. It is now 6:30pm and he had another accident, but he also wee'd for a 3rd time in the potty, he will wee whenever I tell him to sit on it, but he won't go on his own accord, so I might have to just start sitting him on it every 15 minutes to half an hour and see how he goes!

He survived the nap with the pull up on, he didn't wee at all. We will see how it copes tonight.

Deb, it sounds like you've done all you can thus far and exhaused all possibilities. I hope the PT goes well and he gets the idea to poo in the toilet very soon. Don't feel too bad about losing it. Everyone has their limit, especially when you've already been dealing with it and nothing seems to work.

Didn't you say you tried naked boot camp before? The only thing I would worry about that is that if he does poo on the floor he will be making finger paint art on the walls for you! :lol:

I'm still wondering what his motivation is to touch the poo. As someone said, maybe it's bothering him after he does it and he doesn't know how to express that or doesn't want to tell you that he did it? Maybe he just likes the texture and is curious? Perhaps you could let him finger paint with real paint and see if he likes it? Now you have me overthinking for sure! :lol:

In any case, I hope you find a solution soon and don't have to deal with this any more.

With Saxon I think it would itch then he'd go to scratch and get it on himself then try to wipe it off on whatever was close by.

Jen: thanks for the support. I have asked him why he touches it and he says "I don't know" he doesn't even say if it's sore or itchy, he does know those words, but I think he is embarassed he has done it so gets shy about it. He does agree it's yucky and holds his hands as far away from his body as possible, but when it's wiped all over his shirt I just dry reach, it seriously makes me sick! Yes I have done naked boot camp last summer but he wasn't really ready for it, he just peed everywhere and asked for a nappy when he needed to poop.

Stacey: that sounds like a a logical reason! :nod:


Well it's 10:15am, Day 2 of PTing. He has not had an accident yet today, I have sat him on the potty about 4 times, and one of those times he did a massive wee, which he was very proud off (I am giving him Winnie the Pooh stickers as rewards) which he loves. He is responding to me guiding him to the potty but won't tell me when he needs to go, but one step at the time. He has not done a poo since the one he smeared everywhere yesterday morning, which worries me that he is holding onto them, I have told him he can poo in the potty and he said "ok" but hasn't done it yet. :dunno: we will see how today goes, if I can get through the day with no accidents I am going to send him to daycare tomorrow in undies and see how he goes

From what I remember of the other two, I think they have to get weeing down pat first before poo. Good luck, sounds like it's going well so far! :)

Baby steps right Deb!

When Mason was training he was 2yr 10mo and on Hallowe'en he asked to wear underwear that morning and he never wore diapers again (except at night until we ran out and then it was pull ups until about a month ago).

He had worn underwear before but had never asked for them, I just put them on him. Shortly after that we were at AILs and he went over to the corner. I asked if he needed to go poop and he said yes so I told him he was NOT pooping in his underwear that I would put a diaper on him or he could go in the potty. He chose the potty and that was that! Who knows what is going on in their heads.

I hope Riley catches on soon for you. How awful to be facing those messes and constantly dreading the next one. :hug99:

thanks :hug99:

Well we had a pretty good day considering, I had him sitting on the potty regularly and he pee'd multiple times, he did his poop in his pull up the minute I put him down for his lunch time nap, but on the plus side he came out and told me straight away (no touching!) I have told him that he is going to daycare with no nappy on. We will see how he goes. :errr: I will be sure to pack a stack of change of clothes :lol:

Please let this be it!!

Just wanted to update, we are on day 4 and he is doing really well, he is yet to poop in the potty yet, he waits till I put on a pull up for bed time then does it, but he is telling me straight away so he isn't touching it! But as for the weeing side of things, he went to daycare yesterday with undies on, he did not have an accident the entire day. Just as Tony was picking him up, he noticed that his pants were wet, so atleast he went the entire school day without an accident, he then got home and had one more accident before bed :rolleyes: BUT that is huge progress. He has done potty twice this morning, (on my cue) but atleast he has gone and no accidents, I am feeling good about this, I think he is going to do it this time! :nod:

:woo: Sounds good Deb!

[QUOTE=Clare] I've never had the smearing poop problem though :dunno: QUOTE]

I take that back :rolleyes: Guess what Sam did this morning? Stuck his hand down his nappy and pulled out a handful of poop! He didn't smear it though, I think it shocked him so much that he came running to me screaming "yucky"! Hopefully that was enough to scare him off doing it again!

:woo: Riley! Good job buddy :aok: