Feeling guilty for spending time alone

[Dennis]

Mary and I both feel really guilty anytime we do something by ourselves. It's not so much that we feel guilty about not being with the kids, because we don't have this problem when we go out together. It's leaving the other with the kids by themselves that we feel guilty about.

It's funny because I'm fine with it if I stay with the kids while Mary goes out and does something. And she's fine with it if I go and she stays with them. But we both feel really guilty when we go. It's to the point where all I want for for Father's Day is to go mountain biking and not feel guilty about it.

Does anyone else have this problem?

[Suzi]

Dennis, I totally know how you feel! I keep reminding myself though that one of the best things I can do for Julia is be good to myself - and that includes some "me" time. I rejuvenates me as a person AND as a parent (and even as a partner!).

I say go biking, guilt or not. Just pretend you don't feel guilty until you really don't (or at least not as much). Happy Father's Day to you!! :bighug:

[Jayne]

Dennis, I totally know how you feel! I keep reminding myself though that one of the best things I can do for Julia is be good to myself - and that includes some "me" time. I rejuvenates me as a person AND as a parent (and even as a partner!).

I say go biking, guilt or not. Just pretend you don't feel guilty until you really don't (or at least not as much). Happy Father's Day to you!! :bighug:

This is how I feel also. I also think that it is important for the kids to have time alone with Daddy or time alone with mommy. I get the kids all day. Dan loves letting me go do my thing and being home in the evening with them.

Go..have a great time. Mary will be happy that your having a great time!

[Jen]

Wow, could you teach my husband how to feel guilty for leaving the kids with me 95% of the time? :lol:

I would feel more guilty that the kids are not getting enough time with us than I would for spending time alone. Of course, the kids see me far more than they see my husband so I would not feel very guilty leaving them with him. I don't think he ever feels guilty for being away. I guess you just have to push away the guilt :dunno:

If you are both spending enough time with the kids and each other, then there is nothing to feel bad about. The kids will enjoy having a mom and dad who knows how to take care of themselves. And getting some alone time will allow you to have more to give to your wife and kids as well.

[Susan]

I also think that it is important for the kids to have time alone with Daddy or time alone with mommy.

Well said! I couldn't agree more. :)

[Melissa]

A month ago I had a Reed and Katie free weekend, it was pure bliss!!! Because I very rarely have time by myself, I don't feel guilty at all about it. I know that Katie needs some Daddy time, and since I probably haven't had alone time in a while, I REALLY need some time to myself!

[Michele]

I feel guilty about leaving Scott with Jackson sometimes. Mostly b/c I work a few nights a week and they get their alone time then, so I feel bad leaving them on a night that I don't have to work. I've bailed on friends for dinner twice recently b/c I just felt too bad about being gone for reasons other than work....