I'm excited to be joining this section of the board. My husband just got a new job yesterday that will allow me to be a SAHM once this baby is born. It's certainly something I'm looking forward to, but I admit that I'm nervous. I would think it would be a little easier becoming a SAHM after the first one is born, but I will be one with 2 kids as my toddler will be almost 2.5 years old.

Basically I'm wondering if anyone has any advice on how to make the transition less painful. :lol: OK, that sounds odd. But as of now, the only routine I know with Riley is one that involves my husband and myself with her on the weekends. I certainly don't want her to become the forgotten child once the baby is here.

I have a close friend who's also a SAHM, and we're planning to get together once a week to let the kids play. Are there other suggestions on what to do during the day with the kids? I worry that since Riley is in a structured environment currently (she's at a daycare center) that she'll get "bored" with just me and the baby. I certainly want her the thrive with me at home, but I know there's no way to be "super mom." :)

Sorry if this is long-winded. Guess I'm just looking for advice or suggestions on how to prevent us from going too crazy.

I bet Riley will be just as excited as you at the prospect of mommy being a SAHM :) Congratulations to both yourself and DH!

Advice, I honestly dont have much, my life is so busy running a home and playing with the kids. Definately do make arrangements to meet a friend at least once a week, I meet up with a friend every tuesday, her DD is the same age as mine. It is also something for you to look forward to.

Is there a mommy and toddler group near you? I go to one and its a great place to meet other moms also it keeps DD socialised, she has never been to daycare.

I always tend to set afternoons for playtime with DD. She is also 2.5yrs and my DS is 5 months. When he is napping in the afternoon, which he does for 2.5hrs myself and DD get involved with all sorts of activities such as baking, crafts or even just out in the garden (Baby monitor strapped to belt!).

Things will unfold for both of you, not only is this a new transition for you, it is for your DD and as you well know a 2yr old will tell you what s/he wants!

Good luck :)

The key for me to stay sane as a SAHM is to stay busy! I have gotten Jackson involved in a ton of different activities and found a local Mom's group that has once a week playgroups. We also meet up with friends as much as possible, go to indoor play areas in the winter and are at the park almost every day in the summer. We need a little structure, so I tend to book our mornings pretty solid, then we come home for nap, then have one-on-one playtime/read stories/watch TV after naptime. Keeping to this routine helps a lot too (although that may be hard at first with a new baby!).

Jackson has done Kindermusik, Gymnastics, Swimming, Story time, and various structured playgroups. I find that our YMCA has a lot of interesting classes and they are pretty affordable. They also let you bring a baby to your older child's activities (some places like Gymboree won't let you do that). Our library also has free story time as does Barnes & Noble and Borders.

The Mom's group I found isn't affiliated with any national group, it is just local Moms - we have a Yahoo group, and there are 3 "leaders" who are responsible for planning the activites - they alternate weeks. This week is a trip to a local train Museum and then lunch at McDonalds. There are also bigger organizations out there that may have a chapter in your area (like MOPS...etc.)

I would look at local churches, libraries, museums, etc. for activities to do. If you are interested.

I will say that we are having another baby in July and I have enrolled Jackson in a 2 day a week preschool for the fall because of that. I am guessing we'll have to cut back on some of our activites (at least at first) and I want to make sure he is still entertained/socialized. Maybe something like that or a MDO for Riley could be an option?

Good luck! (and at least you'll be starting when the weather is nicer...the real challenge for me is staying busy in the winter....winters are LONG!)

I have to agree with the thngs already suggested. We are busy every day of the week with Y classes (swimming and gymnastics), preschool two days a week, and a trip to the library once a week for storytime and checking out books.

We also belong to a local chapter of Mothers & More, a moms group for "sequencing" women (women who are taking time off from a professional career to be SAHM for some time, whether it be a short or long time). You might check it out - www.mothersandmore.org (http://www.mothersandmore.org/) there is something to do EVERY day of the week - playgroups specifically targeted to your child's age, outings/activities (crafts at the art museum, story time at the library, "dinosaur digs" at the playground, trips to the zoo, tea time for princesses, crafty projects, etc.). moms only meetings, book club, all of that on top of great meetings geared towards personal development! :aok:

:woo: That's such great news, Darcy! I know how much you've wanted this! Congrats to Phil on the new job! :banana:

I agree with all of the suggestions but I also wanted to say don't feel guilty about having days at home either. With a new baby you are not going to want to be running around somewhere every day. If Riley watches a little extra tv in the first few weeks/months, then so be it! She'll be fine and will love being home with you and baby :)

I agree with Clare too...I didn't mention it, but usually we have one day a week where we stay home..especially now that it is cold out. In the summer we'll usually go outside or for a walk on our stay home days, but there have been days in the winter that we haven't left....and those are nice too!

I remember when I first stayed at home, I felt like I had to get everything done quickly before my vacation day ended. Then I realized every day was a "vacation day". Then I realized that I was never going to get a vacation again. :lol:

Everyone has given great advice. There are a ton of activities to sign up for, but don't feel like you need to do everything. I bet Riley will just be happy to hang out with you. And over time you will develop your own routine. I'd really recommend joining some type of moms group too. My MOMS Club has two or three activities every week. You can go to as few or as many things as you can or want to so there's no pressure to make it to everything, as there would be if you signed up for a class.

And I agree, could you continue letting Riley go to a daycare/preschool/MDO for a half day or two a week, to keep that routine going?

I agree about staying busy, but days to just chill at home are great, too! I belong to a MOPS group. www.mops.org It's been so great! I know you would love it!

Congrats on being a SAHM!

I have to agree w/ everyone's advice given so far. The things that helped me really survive were staying busy, yet having a day of downtime, and in the early months, also having Aidan in daycare 2 days/wk. Of course, i had twins, but if you can afford MDO for Riley 1 day/wk for a half-day, go for it!!

The only other thing that I would suggest is that if you can financially swing it (i dont know your plans for maternity leave and whatnot), quit your job before #2 comes. It was so great for me to be able to do that and spend some time with Aidan and get the SAHM thing down. Frankly, he was a tad bored at first when I first quit my job and I had to work with him to get him to play on his own and entertian himself (he was 16 mos when I became a SAH).

Thanks so much for all your advice. I so appreciate it.

I know there's a parent-tot center at the elementary school that meets for 3 hours every day. It's free and drop-in, so that might be something we look into doing. And I'll definitely look into MOMS groups in the area.

In answer to Karri's question, we can't afford for me to quit just yet, even though I'm less than 5 weeks to go. I'd lose out on all my maternity leave benefits and we could use that extra money to pad the savings since Phil had been out of work for almost 2 months. But keeping Riley in daycare one day a week might not be a bad idea if we can swing it and the center offers it. Plus right now the thought of spending the day chasing her around the house while being so pg doesn't sound like fun. :lol: I can barely get up out of my chair at work without sounding like an old lady.