Baby shower gift...?

[JustJen]

One of my closest friends since childhood, Amy is finally pregnant. She has a lot of medical problems......celiac disease, severe diabetes and only half of her cervix....so this may be her ONLY pregnancy.
I bought her the skip hop duo off the site that Mandy posted in another thread.
I also bought one for one of our other friends who is pregnant, Cori. She's due 5 weeks after Amy.

I have already given Amy all of Isabella's hand me down clothes, infant toys, maternity clothes, etc.

I was planning to put the Arbonne baby line inside her skip hop duo along with a gymboree layette outfit.

Cori is throwing Amy's babyshower as her gift to her.
Since I am not as close to Cori I wanted to give her her gift at Amy's baby shower. Although I am not planning on buying her the Arbonne baby line or an outfit for the baby. Just giving her the skip hop duo. I don't think I'll be invited to Cori's baby shower. (She is very shy and everything is very intimate. Just her VERY close couple of friends and family.)

Couple questions....
1) Is it rude to give 2 friends unequal gifts at the same time?? I mean, I am closer to Amy, but I don't want to make Cori feel bad by giving her less of a gift.

2) Will it be rude to give Amy so many gifts?
I know a lot of our friends will probably give her smaller items. And Cori isn't buying her anything since she's throwing the party and buying everything she needs for her own baby.

3) Am I really silly/stupid/pathetic to be worrying about this?

Jim thinks I'm over thinking something as simple as giving friends gifts. But I really DON'T want to offend anyone.

And Amy being pregnant is a HUGE deal. She's been at all our children's births, I'm the first person she told after her husband and Dad that she was pregnant, she is one of my oldest dearest friends.

[Bridget]

I think you are in the right to give whatever type of gift you prefer. You've been friends with Amy a long time and I see nothing wrong with giving her anything you wish, or as much as you wish.

Even though Cori is also pregnant, the party is for Amy and Cori likely won't expect anything, esp. since you and she are not as close.

I know at my baby showers there were always people who gave more/less depending on how close they were to me and no one thought anything of it - including me.

My only advice is that you might want to give Cori her give later in the day/evening - perhaps as you are getting ready to go. That way, it doesn't take away from what is Amy's event, is a nice and welcome surprise for Cori, and it won't be opened at the same time, causing any unneeded "comparison."

What do you think?

[pam]

I think that your gift for Amy sounds really sweet & that your gifts for both friends sound appropriate given your relationships with each. I'm not so sure that I think it's "appropriate" to give Cori a present at Amy's shower. If the shower is for Amy, the gifts given, IMO, should just be for Amy (unless Amy is giving Cori a present for throwing the shower). If I were in Amy's shoes, given what she has gone through to get pregnant, I might feel a little bit of discomfort & maybe percieve that my pregnany wasn't as important to you if you gave someone else a present (though clearly it's very important to you). Other people may feel differently, but personally having gone through a lot to get to this place myself (a bunch of losses & years of extensive IF treatmeht, I am 40+weeks pregnant & often a little oversensitive as a result)...I think I would feel a bit hurt (& don't think that you are intending that at all). Can you send the present to Cori or find some other way to give it to her besides at the shower? That would be my suggestion.

[Theresa]

Can you send the present to Cori or find some other way to give it to her besides at the shower? That would be my suggestion.
I was going to suggest the same thing. Maybe you could just send Cori something when her baby is actually born. Then you won't be taking anything away from Amy and there will be no "comparison".

[Kaybee711]

She is a closer friend to you. I think you are being very appropriate. Cori will be honored to get any gift at all.

[~Andrea~]

My suggestion, if you you want to give Cori the gift at the shower, give it to her at the end. If she's as shy as you say, she won't want to open it in front of Amy's friends anyway. Maybe as you are leaving, say something like "I didn't want to take away from Amy's day but I got you a little something too." Maybe suggest she not have to open it in front of you. :dunno: