Do you have your kids open presents in front of the gift giver/s at a birthday party, or wait until after the party when everyone's gone home to open them then?

We open presents at the party. We've never gone to a party where presents weren't opened. I know people would be disappointed if we didn't open them.

We always open gifts during the party but I know many that do not, especially for kid parties.

We do not open gifts at the party. It's too hard to police the other kids who want to help open/open and play with/generally take over a gift they like and still run the party, on top of which with a winter birthday we generally have the party at a site who only allow a limited amount of time, and why should Caroline miss out on being with her friends to open gifts? So we open them at home when it's calmer, it's easier to keep track of who gave which gift, and pieces aren't getting lost.

We don't open them at Joe and Frances' parties for pretty much the same reasons Anne said. It gets too chaotic and the kids lose interest before they are done. Also, for Joe's last party we requested no gifts but some people brought them anyway, so it would've been really awkward opening them in front of everyone.

Dennis

We open presents at the party. We've never gone to a party where presents weren't opened. I know people would be disappointed if we didn't open them.Ditto :nod:

I do open the presents at the party. Although I really do understand why people don't, personally I prefer to have people see their present be opened/the kids reaction - and I also like that when I give a gift as well.

We don't like to open presents at parties, mostly b/c so far every time we have, it's resulted in mass chaos. However, someone usually insists (one of our regular guests in particular, she ALWAYS begs us to open them), so we usually give in and do it anyway.

But I still shudder when I think about Emma's 2nd bday party, where three screaming toddlers resorted to mass tears and tantrums after fighting after a newly opened doll stroller. :rolleyes:

We don't...for the reasons Anne and Dennis stated. After the party is when the gifts are opened.....so it's almost like a part II to the initial party minus the chaos. :lol:

So far we've always opened gifts, and will continue to do so unless the guest list gets so large chaos would ensue. Our current social circle includes just three other children besides my two, so it's pretty calm. Two of them are boys, so they aren't usually too interested in Emily's dolls and girlie stuff! :lol:

We open gifts at the party.

We open presents at the party. We've never gone to a party where presents weren't opened. I know people would be disappointed if we didn't open them.

Ditto

Two of them are boys, so they aren't usually too interested in Emily's dolls and girlie stuff! :lol:

And the other one is my daughter and I tackle her when she goes for Emily's presents :lol:

We have never gone to a party where they didn't open the gifts there. BUT, we are asking for donations this time so I think we'll open any gifts that people bring later on. That way, nobody feels bad for giving a donation and not a gift (which is what they asked for).

We have not had a kid party yet... just family. Since Caroline starts pre-school this year, we'll have one when she turns 4, but her b-day is in June, so I think I'll see what the trend is and just do what everyone else does :)

We open presents at the party. We've never gone to a party where presents weren't opened. I know people would be disappointed if we didn't open them.
Ditto. I know I would be disappointed if I went to a party and didn't get to see the child's reaction when he/she opened my gift.

For those that would be disappointed if they didn't see a kid's reaction, would you be similarly disappointed if the child's only reaction was crying/annoyance/blank/whatever because the child is stressed out or losing interest or having a tantrum to go be with their friends instead of dutifully opening gifts? :dunno: I guess I just don't see the point of pinning a kid down to make them open a pile of presents just for people to watch while the kid wants to be off eating cake or playing games with their friends or something.

I've never seen such a thing (kids freaking out about gifts) :dunno: I've got a DD who will be 12 in less than 2 weeks, as well as a 6 1/2 yo son and a son who just turned 3 two weeks ago, and we have an extended family filled with kids, so we've thrown and been to countless parties. (We have 16 family birthdays in August alone, including everyone in my house except Jayden). :faint: I've never been to one where the gifts weren't opened and I've never seen the things described. I understand the concern, and I have nothing against anyone who chooses to do things differently. Of course, if the child isn't interested in opening the gifts, that is different. But I've never seen that happen either. :dunno:

I've never seen such a thing (kids freaking out about gifts) :dunno: I've got a DD who will be 12 in less than 2 weeks, as well as a 6 1/2 yo son and a son who just turned 3 two weeks ago, and we have an extended family filled with kids, so we've thrown and been to countless parties. (We have 16 family birthdays in August alone, including everyone in my house except Jayden). :faint: I've never been to one where the gifts weren't opened and I've never seen the things described. I understand the concern, and I have nothing against anyone who chooses to do things differently. Of course, if the child isn't interested in opening the gifts, that is different. But I've never seen that happen either. :dunno:
I've never seen that happen either...

I wonder: is it a numbers issue? As far as, if you have a group larger than 10 kids, say, I can see how it might be overwhelming for them all to keep it together during the opening of so many presents. Are the guests' parents around, or are these kids being dropped off at the party and picked up a couple of hours later? Like Shel said above, she would tackle her daughter if she saw her going for the b-day child's presents but I can see there would be an issue if the only adults present are the hosts of the party.

I guess I could've spun these questions off but I'm too sleepy to do so :sleeping:

I've never seen such a thing (kids freaking out about gifts) :dunno:

Me neither.

I've seen the guests (kids and adults) go off and do other things while the birthday child is opening presents but I've never seen the birthday child get tired of opening things.

And I think kid's reactions are so cute to things. You have to know that if you give a child underwear or jeans they might just pull them out and say "more clothes..." But that's part of the fun.

One way we kept kids out of Rebekah's presents this last time is that we sat her at a table and had everyone else sitting facing her in our living room. Worked great.

Also...I've never been to a kid's party where the parents didn't stay with the kids. I'd expect to stay with my kid at the party until she's alot older than 3. So I don't see "crowd control" being an issue at this age.

For those that would be disappointed if they didn't see a kid's reaction, would you be similarly disappointed if the child's only reaction was crying/annoyance/blank/whatever because the child is stressed out or losing interest or having a tantrum to go be with their friends instead of dutifully opening gifts? :dunno: I guess I just don't see the point of pinning a kid down to make them open a pile of presents just for people to watch while the kid wants to be off eating cake or playing games with their friends or something.
To me, it teaches the child to appreciate what has been given to them. Not letting them have the attitude of "Wow! More presents for me! *yawn*" Hopefully, it will instill in them that people put effort into getting a gift and that effort should be appreciated.

For those that would be disappointed if they didn't see a kid's reaction, would you be similarly disappointed if the child's only reaction was crying/annoyance/blank/whatever because the child is stressed out or losing interest or having a tantrum to go be with their friends instead of dutifully opening gifts? :dunno: I guess I just don't see the point of pinning a kid down to make them open a pile of presents just for people to watch while the kid wants to be off eating cake or playing games with their friends or something.

We've never had this problem. I have been embarrassed when one of the kids opens a gift and says "oh I've already got this" or "boring clothes" in a disappointed tone :blush:

But I don't think it's rude not to open gifts at the party. Especially if you are planning on sending thankyou notes afterwards.

I wonder: is it a numbers issue?

I'm wondering that as well. At Joe and Frances' parties there have been probaby 10 to 15 gifts. That just gets to be overwhelming for a 2 or 3 year old at the end of a party. If there were only 4 or 5 presents to open then I would be much more inclined to do it during the party.

Dennis

We open presents at their parties and we've also never been to one where the gifts weren't opened.


I totally agree with Brooke. I think the reaction is part of the fun. I don't get offended because someone doesn't like a particular gift or already has it. It's not a personal attack, it's just their particular like/dislikes.

We open gifts and I would be dissappointed if I went to a party and our gift wasn't opened. I wouldn'r expect all the firends to sit and watch and if my kid wanted to play we would open the gifts later or a few here and a few there. Never seen anyon freak over opening gifts either but we always just have like 3-4 friends invited.

That's a huge part of it, IMO. For instance, for Caroline's birthday we had ten kids there. Then DH's parents and my parents, neither of which buys just one gift, and who wanted their gifts opened at the same time as everyone else's. That was nearly TWENTY gifts. It would have taken her the whole last hour of the party to do it! Which is why we chose to open them at home when we could take the time to note who gave what, make sure no cards or pieces were lost, etc.

I'm wondering that as well. At Joe and Frances' parties there have been probaby 10 to 15 gifts. That just gets to be overwhelming for a 2 or 3 year old at the end of a party. If there were only 4 or 5 presents to open then I would be much more inclined to do it during the party.

We have only had one party and since it was her first birthday we opened presents. There were only two other children present and one was 4 years old and the other was only 9 months old at the time.

Then DH's parents and my parents, neither of which buys just one gift, and who wanted their gifts opened at the same time as everyone else's. .

See we don't do family gifts at the party. Only the friends/partygoers. We've never actually had a party on the actual birthday yet, so all family presents are opened on the actual birthday not at the party.

Since our families come from out of town, they're not here on the actual birthday and want her to open the gifts while they are here. :) So on the actual birthday we just do gifts from Mommy and Daddy!

Another thing too....if the bday parties are at a place other than a home, your usually only given 2 hrs. max and even if you wanted to open up the gifts, there is simply no time (1 hr. of play and 1/2 hr. to eat & cake, etc.). So for those of you who prefer to have gifts open during the bthday party, will this be an exception or do you still squeeze in the time to quickly open the presents?
I was just curious. :)

Another thing too....if the bday parties are at a place other than a home, your usually only given 2 hrs. max and even if you wanted to open up the gifts, there is simply no time (1 hr. of play and 1/2 hr. to eat & cake, etc.). So for those of you who are adamant about having gifts open during the bthday party, will this be an exception or do you still squeeze in the time to quickly open the presents?
I was just curious. :)Personally, I never said I am adamant about gifts being opened. It's just what we are used to. I just wanted to clarify that ;) It's funny, because since I've never been to a party where the gifts are not opened, it is just completely normal to me for the child to open their gifts :dunno: It would seem odd to me if they didn't :scratch: but I would not be angry or anything - just confused :lol:


Like I said, with three kids of my own and many children in our family, I've been to countless parties, and most were at places other than home like you mention. Opening gifts doesn't take long - the kids tear through things quicker than you can imagine :lol: I attended a double party once for two brothers with close birthdays. It was at the university pool, and there were about 50 kids there (each child was allowed to invite 25). The boys both opened their gifts together. It didn't take much time at all. Generally, there is always a designated person in the birthday child's family who writes down who gave the child what for thank you purposes. You're right - those party places only allow 2 hours. But it's always been enough time at the parties we've attended.

Thanks Jen. :) Maybe I should change the word 'adamant', so noone takes it the wrong way. I understand what your saying....it's just what your use to. :) I just wasn't sure if the same would apply over at a place where you only have 1 1/2 hrs. For us, there's no way all the presents would be opened in that short amt. of time. It's just odd cause the 'norm' around here is it's not opened during the parties. :dunno: It's been a long while that we've been to a party that the presents were opened during the party.

Opening gifts doesn't take long - the kids tear through things quicker than you can imagine :lol:

I think this is an age thing as well. My experience has been that 2 and 3 year olds don't open their presents all that quickly. But maybe that's just our kids and the kids we know.

Dennis

two hours? Hmmmm, I don't remember if that was the case when we celebrated birthdays for DS#1 (he's 14yo, so things may be different now, those parties were AGES ago, LOL!) but he always opened presents after cake and then everybody went to play for however long we were allowed to. But yeah, I didn't start having parties for him at a paid venue until he was at least 4yo. I also always limited the number of kid guests to 10, and through the years most parents would stay and hang out (and help).

A not-so-funny story (for me) is that the year DS#1 turned 8yo, I decided to have a pool party for him at the apartment complex where we lived. Practically all the kids lived there too and went to school with my son, which was a big deal b/c he's a July baby and it's always hard to round up people in the Summer. Well, everyone invited came but not ONE parent stayed!!! Not only did they not stay at the party, they didn't even stay home... I wound up having eight little boys at the pool by myself... that was not a fun three hours for me.

Another thing too....if the bday parties are at a place other than a home, your usually only given 2 hrs. max and even if you wanted to open up the gifts, there is simply no time (1 hr. of play and 1/2 hr. to eat & cake, etc.). So for those of you who prefer to have gifts open during the bthday party, will this be an exception or do you still squeeze in the time to quickly open the presents?
I was just curious. :)
If it were at a place like this, I would understand not opening gifts. I might be a little disappointed, but I would understand.

At the party, but only because my mom refuses to leave untill they've opened them.

I'm not "adamant" about it either, it's just part of the party schedule.