TTC after m/c Support Thread

[corjack]

I was wondering if anyone would be interested in a TTC after m/c cycle buddies and support thread???

My name is Jackie. I have a daughter Grace who is 20 months old. Before i had Grace I had a tubal pregnancy that resulted in a tubal rupture taking out one of my tubes. After I had Gracie I got pg when she was about 8 months old and lost htat pgcy at 19 weeks due to a chromosome problem.

I have found TTC after a loss to be VERY difficult emotionally. I belong to a group like this else where and think it could really a be a big help to those who are TTC after a loss or just deaing with loss in general.

Let me know if you are interested. Or you can just post here and we will keep it going. I can kep stats if you like or not.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie: I think this is a wonderful idea. My name is Melissa and I have a 3 year old son. Dh and I decided to TTC in October of 2003. Last March I got a :bfp: I was very excited. Unfortuantely that happiness was short lived. On April 22nd I started to m/c. On May 7th I went into the hospital for d&c and found out that I had a tubal and ended up losing my right tube. We started TTC again in June after my first period. It's been very difficult. I keep thinking something is wrong with me, why else would it take so long to get pregnant? I feel like a failure as a woman and get discouraged everytime AF shows.

PS: Welcome to OUAL!

[Racegirl]

HI Jackie,

I was surprised to see you hear. Someone that I know and can chat with. I don't normally post, but I had to post here and let you know that: 1) I am here and 2) I'm here to support you on yoour journey.
Thank you so much for the pic of Gracie in her easter dress. She is so adorable. Good luck with TTC....even though I know that you were talking about taking a break for a few months. Hope all is well. Miss you loads.
H

[Bev]

I absolutely would have loved it! I don't need it right now though, lucky for me.

I have also seen "Pregnant after a Loss" thread that would be valuable too. :)

[corjack]

Melissa, Hi!! I also lost my right tube.

Heidi, great to see you here. :hug:

Beverly, Hi.

I do not frequent this bard as much as I do others so if you girls know anyone TTC after a loss please invite them here.

Jackie

[corjack]

I keep thinking something is wrong with me, why else would it take so long to get pregnant? I feel like a failure as a woman and get discouraged everytime AF shows.

There is nothing wrong with you, most women do not get pg right off the bat. Having a tube removed and leaving an ovary can kinda make things tricky too. Because you will still O for a while from that side and have no tube to get pg with. After a while your right ovary will go dormant and that should help. However, I know that I still O on that side from time to time.
Has your doctor suggested possibly doing the dye in the tube thing to make sure you other tube is clear?

Jackie

[corjack]

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, anyone out there???????

Jackie

[Denise]

Im surprised there arent more girls here. :( I know of THREE more personally that recently had miscarriages as well as myself. Within weeks. :bawl: Friends too which makes it even harder...And a new friend added. :)
I would love to have a place to come to. :) What do we need to do??

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie: Thank you! So my right ovary will eventually quit producing eggs and I will start O on the left side every month? That is great. My tube was removed last May. It's coming up on a year ago that all of it happened.

Denise: I am so glad that you came over. :hug99: How are you doing? I pray for you every night. You did what you needed..you posted. Now you are one of us! ;)

[corjack]

Glad to see some activity. I think we could just keep this thread going. Feel free to invite who ever you think would like to join. We can do TTC stats. Just let me know where arll of you are in your cycles or if your waiting to TTC or whatever your status is.

Af showed for me today. :(

Jackie

[corjack]

Okay there are 103 views and 9 posts here, you lurkers, come out and post!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

We are on CD11 today. I have a chart. We are in the :sex: phase of the month so DH is pretty happy. ;) I hope this is our month. We have been trying again since last June/July and I am just so ready. Here is my chart: Melissa's Chart (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)

[corjack]

We all have Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie CD3
Melissa CD11

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD3
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD11

[corjack]

Okay, we are off and running. I cannot edit because I am not subscribed. So I had to post twice because I forgot chart links!

Nothing happening today.

Melissa, is your cycle pretty regular??

Anyone tried fertility blend??

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Thanks Jackie!!

[corjack]

Happy Birthday Denise!!!!!!!!!!

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Happy Birthday Denise!!! :balloons:

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie my cycle is sort of regular. Generally between 28-33 days. I have been charting for 4 months so I am starting to see a pattern. Hopefully this will be my last month charting. :crossfing
How about you?

[corjack]

I take Glucophage and with it my cycles are regular. I was a little "off" for a few months after my m/c, I think because I was so far a long. It took a bit to get things back to normal.

It took us almost 4 years to get pg with Gracie so I ahve been temping for a long time. I just do it because after so long I am addicted to the thermometer!!! :lol:

I hope that some more people join....where is everyone?

Jackie

[sheila]

Would you like the title of this thread changed to something that will make it more recognizable... like TTC after m/c Support Thread or TTC after m/c Journal? Maybe that will help with the traffic?

[MamaGoofy]

Sheila: I think that would be great! TTC after m/c Support Thread would be great! I think that will help people come in more and we can all band together!!!

[sheila]

Done! Sorry it took me so long to think of it! :crazy:

[MamaGoofy]

Awesome! Thanks Sheila!

[corjack]

Great idea!!!!!!!!! Thanks Sheila!!

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 4
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 12

[Bev]

I'm here to provide some support for those nerve-wracking days after a BFP. :)

[corjack]

Thanks Bev. I hope that this thread catches on. I know right after my m/c I was just lost and felt so alone.

I am really just feeling like I am never going to get pg again. I am TAB a few months from the FM and all that jazz. I do temp some in the middle of my cycle to see if/when I am probably Oing, but TTC is really stressful and I needed a break. We are not avoiding either so anything can happen.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie I felt the same way. With all the wonderful people here (Bev and Shel) to name a few..I didn't feel so alone or messed up. I love the support and love from this community. I don't know how I would have made it thru last year with out them. With that said tomorrow is a year that I m/c. I am very sad about waking up tomorrow. Just this time last year I was excited with a wonderful pregnancy. Here I am a year later still trying. It's just so sad. Thank you so much for starting this thread. I really will need it tomorrow!! :bawl: I really wish there was a way to just skip over tomorrow. KWIM? Gotta go...time to make a baby....:)

[Bev]

Oh Melissa. :blue: It's so hard isn't it. :hug99: I don't know what was harder for me the EDD, knowing I wasn't allowed to TTC for 3 months at the earliest (9 months if I waited the "recommended" time) or the first anniversary of my diagnosis. That was really hard, because I was diagnosed and D&C right at Mother's Day. Good luck with your BDing! :)

I found TTC very stressful too. Partly because of "advanced maternal age, being told my eggs were no good, DH's sperm was bad and all sorts of nonsense. Then when I finally gave up and thought it was hopeless :bfp: I wish that luck on everyone! :)

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 5
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 13



Cheerleaders

Beverly

[corjack]

Melissa, I think the anniversary of my actual loss will be very hard. I know what you mean about skipping that day. I am thinking of you sweety!

:hi: Bev. I added you to the list. :)

Jackie

[Denise]

Thank you for the bday wishes Jackie and Melissa!!!
I dont feel so alone anymore. :)
I am so glad to see this thread!!
I have to wait until May 6th and get blood work done to see if its my progesterone that is low and if I need meds. Wish me luck!
I think some people dont want to face TTC afte a m/c. :( Such a great support system IMHO.
Thanks for being here for me. :hug99:

[Denise]

Melissa~Im sorry such a happy day for me is a sad day for you.
Thinking of you!

[MamaGoofy]

I hope you had a wonderful birthday Denise!! It wasn't to bad. I got a lot of support here and when I got home my wonderful dh didn't allow me anytime to even think about it. He took us out to dinner and we had a great family night!!

Beverly you are just awesome and because of your strength it gives me hope!

[Bev]

Melissa I'm glad your day wasn't so bad.

Denise about the progesterone. I think it is like chicken soup for a cold. It might work, it might not, but it's the best thing we've got! I believe baby aspirin is good for TTC after an unexplained m/c.

Sometimes I think the worst thing about TTC after a loss, is that no one else seems to remember the dates as well as we do. I remember the date of the diagnosis, 1st D&C, 2nd D&C, start chemo, end chemo, EDD. Sheesh! The list is endless! It's hard to be "alone" on those days because others make you feel foolish for remembering them, but you can't help it. It's not like I want to remember them! :lol: Then of course after the BFP there is the all consuming panic until you pass all your other dates! It gets better though, thankfully. :)

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 6
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 14



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly

[corjack]

Melissa, I am glad your DH kept you busy and you got through the day.

Beverly, I think the hard thing about TTC after a m/c is staying excited about it. I find it really hard to get excited about being pg again. The first 20 weeks are going to be agony.

Denise sweety, I put you as waiting to TTC because I was not sure if you were now actively trying or waiting to see about your progesterone, let me know if I need to move you.

Jackie

[Michelear]

I'm here like Bev... I have a 26 month old and m/c last June. It took ages for it to pass (2 months) and 2 months later we were pregnant again. I was sooo frightened. I didn't want to have the same thing happen again. I know you just went through that, Denise and my heart aches for you! :sadhug: I'm 31 weeks now and everything's going okay so far.
My husband's coworker just had his baby 4 days after our due date with the m/c. I'm happy for them but it always makes me sad when we talk about them. I try not to think about the dates... I try not to even think that it happened to me. To us.
Like Bev I heard about advanced maternal age and how a m/c is more likely. I really don't think I'd have conceived without the OPKs. Seems my mood changes when I O and it's not one that my husband likes! We tend to not BD then! With the opks we did anyway!
I'm here for hugs and hope. At least, I hope hope!

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 7
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 15



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Hi Michele. I am so happy your pg now is going good. I cannot wait to be in your shoes.

Jackie

[Michelear]

I can't wait for you to be, too, Jackie!!! :bighug:

[corjack]

Thanks, hopefully it is sooner rather than later.

I am trying to decide what to do this month. If we got pg we would be due right around the same time as when our m/c EDD is. I just am not sure if we should skip this month, so you think it is bad luck?

JAckie

[Bev]

Thanks, hopefully it is sooner rather than later.

I am trying to decide what to do this month. If we got pg we would be due right around the same time as when our m/c EDD is. I just am not sure if we should skip this month, so you think it is bad luck?

JAckie

Well, having almost had to do IVF to get pregnant this time, I would NOT be skipping a month. It would absolutely freak me out to have a same/similar EDD, but I'd be too paranoid to skip a month because what if that was the month?! We already know we can't control the pregnancy and we certainly can't control getting pregnant, all we can control is the TTC part. So whatever works for you I guess. :dunno: I just know I wouldn't skip.

[corjack]

Well we are not skipping(I talked to Dh). We just can't see wasting a cycle. I agree with you Bev.

I am just ready for another baby.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Jacky I am glad to hear that you aren't skipping a month. I had the same question in February. I wasn't sure if I wanted to get pg in March or not. I got the same answer from Bev as well as a few others. I decided it was hard enough to get pg so I wasn't skipping anything!!

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 8
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 16



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Well you all know what we will be doing next weekend, :lol: I should O Sunday or Monday!

How is everyone doing??

Jackie

[Michelear]

I'm glad you're not skipping, Jackie. :justahug:
And I think you should O on Monday so you have 2 days of BDing in! :awink:

[corjack]

We have a BD schedule for this week, Monday, Wednesday, and Fri-Tues. :lol: Dh will be happy about that. I was sick half of last month and we barely BD'ed at all!

How are you pg girls feeling?? Is there a pg after m/c support thread?

Jackie

[Bev]

We have a BD schedule for this week, Monday, Wednesday, and Fri-Tues. :lol: Dh will be happy about that. I was sick half of last month and we barely BD'ed at all!

How are you pg girls feeling?? Is there a pg after m/c support thread?

Jackie
Good luck Jackie! :)

There was a PG after a Loss thread on UB, but there isn't one here. I think there should be one. :) I'm not sure who would be on it now other than me.

I'm doing fantastic! Only 10 more weeks, hard to believe. Physically this pregnancy is quite similar to the one I had with Mason, very easy, no problems. It was the emotional part for the first 16-20 weeks that I was a wreck. :)

[MamaGoofy]

Wow Bev are you really almost done? It seems like you just announced that you were pg!!! Glad to hear that it's been a good one for you! You deserve it!! :bighug:

[corjack]

I wish I could be one of those women who find out they are pg at 5 months, then I would skip all the worrying.

Beverly, are you having a vaginal delivery?

I would start a thread for the pg after loss and then if it takes off you can have a sub-forum.

Jackie

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 9




In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 17 - 3 DPO



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Hi everyone.........hope your having a good day.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

I'm doing pretty good. I just wish I could find out what is wrong with me. Ears and throat hurt and I am sooo sleepy. No infections and the dr doesn't have a clue. I went to the labs this am to give blood so they could try and figure it out. They forgot to get a urine sample so I have to go back tomorrow. :rolleyes: I just want to fee normal again..whatever that is.

[Bev]

I wish I could be one of those women who find out they are pg at 5 months, then I would skip all the worrying.

Beverly, are you having a vaginal delivery?

I would start a thread for the pg after loss and then if it takes off you can have a sub-forum.

Jackie

Jackie
I hear you on that Jackie!! :lol: I'd better be having a vaginal delivery! I had the perfect L&D with Mason and now I'm paranoid this one won't be the same! :lol: I was at the hospital for 4 hours before he was born, no drugs, no episiotomy; it was pretty easy all told!

Thanks Melissa! It seems like it has gone by very fast! I hope you're feeling better soon. :hug99:

[corjack]

Beverly, I hope that your delievery is as easy this time too. I am also worried about that. I had to be induced, but it was 8 hours from start to finish. I had a epidurl and a episiotomy, but both were not bad.

Melissa, I hope your feeling better soon!

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Thanks guys. I still feel like butt, but I came into work anyway. I needed human contact!! :lol:

[Michelear]

Are you just stressed out, Melissa? Maybe you need some pampering!
Bev, you aren't the only one. And I'm sure there are other girls besides us!

I'm feeling good this pregnancy, too. The worst part was worrying the first trimester. The rest has been normal worrying. And I had no scares at all this one (other than in my mind). I hope it continues! I'm doing another vaginal delivery, if God allows! My first was horrible! days of labor and pitocin and 5 hours of pushing a big episiotomy... I dread this one but also know that whatever I feel will pass and I'll forget most of it! :lol:

[MamaGoofy]

I don't think I am stressed but who knows. :dunno: It's possible. I do know that a good massage, pedicure, manicure would be awesome right about now. Something that is all about me!!! Ohh maybe I will give that to myself for Mother's day. It will help with the sadness that I will feel that day.

[corjack]

Michelle, I hope your labor is easier this time!!!! Episiotomy is the thing i hope to avoid next time. It was not horrible, but it was not fun either. At my hospital they gave me these pads that were ice packs, you had to pop them and then they were COLD. They were AWESOME. Plus some Epi-foam and tucks pads and a spray bottle to wash off instead of wiping. They were all prepared!

Melissa, I thinka aps day is a must. You need to pamper yourself.

Jackie

[corjack]

Sorry I meant SPA day, :lol:

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 10




In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 18 - 4 DPO



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[MamaGoofy]

:lol: Jackie...gottcha!!! Although I am not unwilling to try aps..it may work to!! ;)

[Bev]

:duh: How could I forget you Michele? I don't know that there are a whole lot of us who are currently pg. Some of the IVF gals maybe, lots of heartache there.

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 11




In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 19 - 5 DPO



Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

I really thought this would catch on over here. Maybe peole are just shy? I cannot getinto any where really to ivite anyone and cannot PM. I may have to Sub here eventually. (gotta get the moolah)

Hope your all having a great day.

[MamaGoofy]

This forum was pretty quiet. We can be our own little group!! More personal anyway!! ;) I hope you do subscribe. They have "Angels" if you are interesed, talk to Sheila about it

[Sandy]

I am, sadly, a member of this group. I actually avoid this forum b/c it makes me sad and it makes me admit the losses, if that makes sense.

However, I wanted to pipe up and say hey. I have a beautiful daughter, 18 months. I had a m/c before I got pregnant w/ her, and now I have just had another earlier this month. I had a great, non-eventful pregnancy, so I am hoping that the mc/ was just one of those things. I have started taking one children aspirin in the morning w/ my prenatal though, after hearing that it can help concieve and prevent m/c.

I don't really track my cycles on here b/c it makes me way too obsessive about it. But, I do know the day I O (day 18) and usually make my husband get busy around that time. We concieved this time after about 4 months of loosely trying, so I am hopeful to get pregnant again soon. I love seeing the people on here that are pregnant after a loss. It is so hopeful - even though I am one of those people myself! I also like to see people of "advanced maternal age" get pregnant and have successful pregnancies. I am 35 and that is one of my biggest worries. DH thinks I have years and years left, but I want to get pregnant NOW!!! I haven't ruled out more than two kids, if possible, so I want to get cracking!

I typically O on day 18, then start on day 28. Is that a short time between the two (lunar phase or something like that)? Can that contribute to a m/c?

Sandy

[MamaGoofy]

Sandy I don't have an answer to your last question. Welcome to the thread. Our losses are all painful. I hope to get from this thread the friendship and support to help me deal. I hope you come by often. :hug99:

[Denise]

Hi Girls
Welcome Sandy! I know what you have been through. :( We all do but are here to keep each others spirits up! :)
I think Jackie needs to sub and start a journal. :biggrin:
I went for a pap today since the office informed me its been almost 2 years! And then I go in for loads of blood work on Monday. Fingers crossed that they can figure out whats wrong with me. :(

[Denise]

Sandy~I think the m/c will throw off your cycle since the m/c isnt considered a "period". I have a feeling I am getting AF alot sooner than 28 days after my m/c. Will let you know this week! :)

[corjack]

Melissa, I have a hard time keeping up with everyone. I may sub though.

Sandy I will add a "Trying but not Keeping Track" section just for you!!!!(tomorrow) I also had a m/c then had my daughter then had another m/c, but the dr does not see a pattern. One was tubal and the other was late(19w). I hope your are pg again very soon. As for your LP, (luteal phase) since your not keeping track and are not 100% sure when you O, I think your cycles seems okay. You might want to ask your Dr. I am sure he would want you to chart a few cycles to makes sure of when your O'ing.

Denise, I hope they can give some insight after the blood tests.

I really don't think of this place as sad. Actually it is one of my "links" to my lost child. In a place like this I feel I can openly miss her and express my feelings about and for her.

Love to all, Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie: I hope you do sub. I enjoy chatting with you. You seem to have a positive personality and shoot who doesn't need that! I have to agree. I feel this place is somewhere were I can "remember" my child that I never held.

[Michelear]

I agree! It's like we have to kind of put the m/cs behind us but you don't forget. It's nice to have a place where you can talk about them. Or just know others understand.
One ob I saw while I was going through the m/c told me that his wife had 6 m/c herself! She had 4 pregnancies that she carried to term, too. And he said that that's just what happens sometimes. I've talked to my mom about it and she believes that, since we find out so quickly that we're pregnant now that we know about more of them. Years (decades?) ago you "weren't pregnant" with your first missed period. I'd imagine lots of women that were "late" also had m/c and didn't even know it! I guess it just made me realize that there isn't always something wrong with me or DH. That there are problems that are with that one (or two or three) embryos.
What that doctor said made it easier not to blame myself...

[MamaGoofy]

I always look at my m/c as Gods way of saying "Whoaa..that is way to much for Melissa and Dave to handle right now." I know that when my time is right He will bless me with another healthy child. It hurts that my child was taken but I firmly believe that there is a reason for everything. I take comfort in knowing that I have an Angel watching over me now and when it's my turn to meet my Maker I will see my wonderful child.

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 12


Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 20 - 6 DPO




Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

It's like we have to kind of put the m/cs behind us but you don't forget. It's nice to have a place where you can talk about them.

EXACTLY.

Years (decades?) ago you "weren't pregnant" with your first missed period. I'd imagine lots of women that were "late" also had m/c and didn't even know it!

EXACTLY.

I gotta go find this story and I'll be back to post it. It really has helped me get through my loss.

BRB................................

[MamaGoofy]

How are you doing today Jackie?

[corjack]

November 1983
Oakland, California

Colin, my twelve-year-old son, discovered me late one rainy afternoon sitting at the kitchen table, a damp Kleenex crumpled in my life hand, wiping my eyes as I tried to compose myself for his sake. It was the third week of January, two months after I'd miscarried a pregnancy, but I still found it impossible to get through a day without at least one meltdown into misery.

Stunned when the test came back positive, Rog and I had stared at each other with doubt and ambivalence. At forty-one, my professional life concerned me. I'd just achieved what some had predicted was an impossibility: I'd been granted delivery privileges at Alta Bates, and as a consequence, my midwifery practice had burdgeoned. Some months I delivered twelve babies, and no one ever knew if I'd be home. Rog, too, felt stretched to his limits, keeping his business afloat while picking up the slack for my frequent unscheduled absences. Colin and Jill approached their challenging adolescent years. How could we fit an infant into our lives? But when I lost the pregnancy and all hope for resolution dissolved with my tears, I fell in love with the baby that was not to be.

Colin asked, "Are you crying about the baby?" and when I nodded tearfully, he said, "Well, you just have to have another one, Mom because it's a Spirit Baby, and you should be its mother."

I must have looked puzzled because he said, "Don't you know about Spirit Babies? How could I know about them if you don't? I mean, you're my mom!" But he could see my perplexity.

So my first child, this not-yet-teenage boy, pulled a wooden chair to my side and draped his thin arms across my shoulders, saying, "Well, Mom, here's how it is. See, I was one myself, so that must be how I know. Anyway, every woman has a circle of babies that goes around and around above her head, and those are all the possible babies she could have in her whole life. Every month, one of those babies is first in line. If she gets pregnant, then that's the baby that's born. If she doesn't get pregnant, the baby goes back into the circle and keeps going around with all the others. If she gets pregnant but something bad happens before the baby's born...now listen, Mom, because here's the really cool part. It goes back into the circle, but it becomes a Spirit Baby, and all the other babies give it cuts. Each month, it's always first in line. Isn't that great?

"So you just have to get pregnant again, and you'll have the same Spirit Baby. If you don't, though, then the baby circle will just beam that little Spirit Baby over to some other woman's circle, and it'll be first in line for her. It keeps being first in line somewhere until it finally gets born.

"But it'd be a shame for you not to have it yourself, because I know how much you want it. So you just have to try again. Mom, remember that baby you lost before I was born?" I nodded wordlessly. "Well, that was me. Really, I've always known I was a Spirit Baby. I mean, I know what I'm talking about here, Mom."

In spite of Colin's certainty that our household, so often bordering on chaos, lacked only an infant to make things perfect, Rog and I demurred. But Colin didn't give up and even enlisted his sister's support. Driving with them in the car one evening, I looked at my son in the passenger seat beside me. He stared out the side window and tried to hide his tears, but I saw the flush on his face, the shaking of his shoulders, and the surreptitious swipe of hand across cheek.

Six months had passed since my miscarriage, and I had just finished yet another discussion in which I'd told my pleading son that having a third baby at my age was out of the question. I reached over the space between us and squeezed his fingers. "Colin, I don't understand this passion you have for a baby. Why do you want one so much?"

He tore his gaze from the distant hills and looked at me with swimming eyes and trembling lips. In a choking voice, he put all of his twelve-year-old passion into his reply.

"Oh, Mom! Oh. Just for the joy of it!"

Jill stretched forward from the back seat and placed a hand on each of our shoulders. "Yeah, Mom, just for the joy of it."

It was my turn to look out the side window and struggle with misty vision.

So, at a time when most women eye the empty nest at the end of their branch on the family tree with something approaching relief, I gave consideration to laying just one more egg. Several months of discussions peppered with doubt and disbelief followed. Although Rog and I made the final decision, there's no denying that a big part of our decision to have a third child began with the insistence of our adolescent children that we "needed a baby in the house". Rog and I took a deep breath, looked at each other across the blond heads of those two wishful children, swallowed--and made a giant leap of faith.

I conceived my Spirit Baby a week later. Just for the joy of it.


This may seem hokey to some people, but part of my extreme sadness after my loss was that my child would never get to see the sky or have a life. I was further along so these dreams were very real to me for my child. By 19 weeks(or sooner) you have a whole vision of your childs life.

Maybe it will help someone else.

Jackie

[corjack]

I am doing good. i need a shower though, :lol: Gracie will take a nap in a little bit and maybe I can get one in.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

I hope you get your shower!! Those are really important!! I hope you have a great weekend!

[corjack]

No shower yet, I will when DH comes home, then I do not have to hurry and can enjoy it, :lol:

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

I totally understand that concept!!! :lol:

[Bev]

Love that story Jackie! Here's something exciting. A lady I work with has a daughter who I think is about 27 or so, I'm not too sure. Anyway in the last 18 months or so she has had at least 4 m/c's and a still birth at 18-20 weeks. For no reason. They did an autopsy on the baby and couldn't figure it out; nothing wrong with the placenta or the baby, very perplexing. Anyway she is currently pregnant and due May 12th and she thinks she is in labour! :) Her mom is beside herself with excitement. This pregnancy was very hard on her emotionally but finally with any luck, she'll have her wee one this weekend. That's what we all need to focus on. Holding our Spirit Babies. :)

[corjack]

Beverly that is so awesome that she is finally going to have her baby in her arms.

The thought of Spirit Babies, just gives me hope.

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 13


Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 21 - 7 DPO




Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 14


Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 22 - 8 DPO




Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

I hope everyone had a great weekend!!!

Not much to report here. Still waiting to O!!

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

I had a pretty good weekend..forgot to temp this morning...I hope my temps are still up..

[corjack]

:crossfing Melissa!!! So will you be testing this weekend???

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Probably. I am supposed to start on Saturday so I don't know if I am going to test then or wait until Monday. I don't want to do it on Sunday. Sunday is already going to be a sad day so I don't want to add to it in case I don't get my bfp.

[corjack]

What is Sunday? I musta missed it? I will be thinking of you. You could test Saturday. I always test at 13dpo.

Jackie

[Michelear]

I tested at 13 dpo and got a negative then 3 days later it was postive. I was sooo bummed with the negative. I'll be hoping for a bfp for you Melissa, whenever you test!

[MamaGoofy]

Sunday will mark a year that I had my D&C. It was a horrible way to spend mothers day last year. Laid up in bed on drugs missing the child that I lost.

Thanks Michele :bighug:

[corjack]

:hi: Michelle!!!

Melissa, I am so sorry. How terrible for Mother's Day. I hope you have BFP this year.

I got a temp jump today so I should be in the 2ww if it stays up tomorrow!

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 16


Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 24 - 10 DPO




Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Melissa, that is a GREAT temp jump today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MamaGoofy]

yeah, but I think it's becuase I was running a slight fever when I got up this am. We will see come Monday.

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie; Looks like you have joined me in the 2WW. Come on over!

[corjack]

I ogtta wait and see if it is still up tomorrow, but then I will be there and happy to join you.

Jackie

[Denise]

Went for bloodwork yesterday...they took 12 yes 12 vials from me!! They did a screening for progesterone, TSH and a series of thrombophelia (?) anyone? I will get the results by the end of the week. :rolleyes:
GOOD LUCK Melissa!! And Jackie!!! Hope there's some good news around here soon!! We so need it!!

[MamaGoofy]

my temps are still going up!!!

[Denise]

YEAY Melissa!! :yippee:

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O




Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 25 - 11 DPO

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 17 - 3 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Melissa, I think that this Mother's Day is going to be ALOT better than last year. I say test Saturday!

I put my temp intoday and it was low so I expected that I would O today or tomorrow but FF gave me a coverline and O date of cd14!!! YAY!!

JAckie

[MamaGoofy]

Yeah!! Welcome to the 2WW group!!

I think I am going to wait and see how my temps are for the rest of the week. If they continue going up or stay up then MAYBE I will test Saturday. I just usually start 14 -15 days after O so....:dunno: We will see!!! Keep the prayers comeing and send me all the high temp vibes you have left laying around!! I could really use them!!!

[Sarah]

Well after Jackie's convincing I'm coming out of hiding.:) I am a member of this group with Jackie over at OLU too. I have to say it's sad that there are already so many members here.:( I really wish that there was no need for this and all the pain that goes with it. Hopefully we'll get some good BFP's in the next two weeks.:)

I'm Sarah and I just had my sixth loss last month. This last one was ectopic. I had methotrexate on April 16th then surgery on the 20th since the baby was still growing. I find I am having a very hard time with this all. More than the others initially. Our other losses were naturally but this one I had to go in and terminate the baby because it was in my tube. I know that I had to do this and there was absolutly no other option. But the fact that this baby was trying so hard to stay with us is crushing me. I can't even think about it without breaking down. Our other babies have left us on their own, no medical intervention. But it is very hard for me to handle the fact that this one seemed to really fight. If my tube hadn't caught it up I might still be pg. I am trying so so very hard to get thru this. But each day it seems to get a little worse instead of better. I didn't really deal with it until the last week or two since the fear of surgery(before the surgery I didn't know for over a week which way it would go) then afterwards just recovering from it.

I have an appointment with our RE on Wednesday. I'm sure he'll give me the ok to start my gluco again. Then after a couple months we'll try again I think. They will monitor every step of my cycle so they can jump in at anytime and make sure everything is what it should be. I do also take progesterone supplements, asprin, 4 mg of folic acid along with acupuncture to try to help. Hopefully when we try again it will be a keeper.

Oh and Denise, I'm glad you were able to get all your blood tests done. Hopefully they will figure out what is going on so they can fix it. I really hope you and Vin get pg real soon and stay pg!:)

Sarah

[MamaGoofy]

Sarah: :hug99: I know what you mean!! I really wish there wasn't a need for this type of thread either!! I am glad you came out of hiding. I hope you find comfort here! :justahug: Welcome to OUAL!

[Denise]

Thanks Sarah! I am glad you are here to for support. YOu have been on my mind. :hug99:
WOW! TWO 2 WW'ers! :yippee: I am so so excited!

[Sandy]

Wow Sarah,:sadhug: to you. I can't imagine how hard this must be. I am glad you came out of hiding, I was kinda the same way. Hopefully being here will give you some comfort.

Sandy

[corjack]

Sarah sweety. I am so sorry that things are so complicated. Seems like having a baby should not bring on so much hurt. I hope everyday for you to have your burdens lifted with another healthy pgcy.

I am so glad your still doing the Gluc, I bet it makes a HUGE difference!!!!! how long do you have to wait after the Methotrexate?

Thinking of you!

Jackie

[Bev]

Oh Sarah! :hug99: I knew about the loss from the IVF thread but I had no idea it was so complicated. :blue:

Jackie, with just one shot of mtx I don't think you have to wait that long, it clears the system pretty quickly. It is teratogenic (sp?) though and when I had my shots they wanted me to wait a year, but I only waited 6 months because my gyn-onc knew I was anxious to TTC because of my "advanced maternal age" and I had responded quite well to it.

[Sarah]

Thank you guys.:) I know we'll get thru this. It's just seems even harder than our last. I haven't even really talked to Brandon about it. He is crazy stressed right now. Work is nuts, Riley has been a serious handful lately and then all this. I know if I really tell him how I feel he'll want to put off ttc much much longer. And well I don't want to do that. Our RE has already expressed we're working with not too much time here given my problems seem to be getting much worse. I was going to talk to him last night be he was clearly not in a good mood. I really worry about him and how he handles stress. He gets sick all the time because he just worries so much. Hopefully things will get easier soon.

I meet with our RE next wed to find out for sure when I'll start the gluco. I had an appointment with my OB this week and I asked him when I could start my vitamins and herbs and all that again. He said now was fine. That the metho clears out pretty fast. We'll see what my RE actually says about the gluco though. I'll wait for his ok first. My acupuncturist really wants to put me on a few herbs that could really help so I wanted to get that going right away. I asked the nurse on the phone one time how long we'd have to wait after the metho and she said one cycle, but I'm not sure how much I believe that. I've heard three from most other people so we'll see what he says next week.

Recovery wise I feel really good. Not much pain anymore at all. I'm still not pushing myself because I don't want to bring on more scar tissue that was my fourth surgery on my belly so I need to be careful of that. But I'm surprised how quickly I recoved. The first few days were bad but now I'm fine so that is good.

So Jackie you can throw me into the waiting to conceive side for right now. If all goes well we'll probably start again in June or July. My RE will monitor which side I O from so I might think about skipping at least one or two cycles on my left side just to make sure nothing gets stuck. Course we did find out that I O'd from my right but had the ectopic on my left. So I don't know?

Have a great day ladies. I really hope we get some good news here soon. I need some good news!

Sarah

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O




Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 26 - 12 DPO

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 18 - 3 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Hey Sarah, I hope that your RE starts you right away, and I bet he does!

FF moved me O date back a day and moved my coverline up. My temps are way low. Who knows. I am not going to worry about it. A BFP this month I have mixed feelings about anyway.

JAckie

[Bev]

Sarah, I really don't think you need to wait three cycles after one shot of methotrexate. I had 50ml IM weekly for 12 weeks and my gyn-onc told me I only had to wait 6 months. So it seems excessive to wait for 3 months for one shot. KWIM?

[Sarah]

Jackie I think you're right. I'm sure he won't wait on it. And I'm still holding hope for you!:)

Beverly I acutally had two shots at the same time totaling 120ml IM so I don't know if that will make a difference or not. Wow I can't believe you had 12 of them. I thought they only did two shots and then moved to surgery. That must have been so hard.:(

[Bev]

Sarah, my mtx wasn't for an ectopic. I had a complete molar pregnancy in May 2003. That is where there is no baby, just a placenta that can become a tumour. Most go away after a D&C, but mine was as stubborn as it's host and needed 2 D&C and 12 shots of mtx to go away. :lol:

Jeez, I can't believe it's been 2 years this weekend since the diagnosis/D&C. Crazy!

It was much easier having that and knowing it was contained within the uterus than it was watching the gals with ovarian and breast cancer every week at the cancer centre. I felt pretty lucky actually as strange as that might sound.

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O




Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 27 - 13 DPO

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 19 - 5 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

FF changed my O day back to cd 14 again??? Who knows!!!!

Beverly, I did not realize you had a molar pgcy. A guy that my DH works with went through the same thing(he and his wife). I was so sad for them. She really had a hard time, kinda like you did. They were not allowed to try again for a year.

jackie

[Bev]

Jackie, Babycenter has an excellent group for molar pregnancy. I'm not a fan of their other boards, but the molar board is so supportive and welcoming. Send her there if she needs to connect with others. There are a ton of us there and we have specific threads for Recently Diagnosed, TTC and Pregnant after a Molar.

Doctors are re-evaluating the year thing, it's way too long and unneccessary. I'm glad I started TTC 6 months after the chemo because it took longer than we thought and we almost had to do IVF.

[corjack]

Thanks Bev.

Where is everyone????

Melissa, I am thinking about you sweety.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Well my temps dropped below my coverline so I think this cycle is officially done. I think I ovulated on my right side (no tube) so that would explain why I had absolutely no symptoms this month. That just means that next month we need to bd more during O week!! ;) I think I finally have a clue as to what is going on with my body. 4 months of charting has really helped!! So no bfp for Mother's day this year, but maybe I will get one next month! One can always hope!!

[corjack]

Sorry Melissa. It is great that you are so positive. I know it is hard to stay that way.

I hope that tomorrow goes ok and you can keep your mind off of things.

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O




Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 28 - 14 DPO

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 20 - 6 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 1



Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 21 - 7 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 2



Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 22 - 8 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Melisa, I am sorry AF showed on Sunday. I was thinking of you and hope the day went ok.

How is everyone else?

jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Actually Jackie...I didn't think about it at all! I was way to busy shopping with my mom!! Thanks for thinking about me though!! I really appreciate it!

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 3



Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 23 - 9 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

I think I will feel the same way this month Melissa. I am sure I am not pg, I have the ugliest chart ever. I am cool with that though. I remember last summer when I was pg i felt like crap all the time. I think I would be cool with getting pg in August so by the time the m/s kicks in the hot weather will be almost gone.

JAckie

[Racegirl]

Good morning Jackie!
Sorry that I haven't been here in ages. I have had a lot going on and have been trying to deal with it myself....although I am not sure it is working, so I am thinking of starting a thread here. I am sure that I am not the only one going through these things. Anyways, wanted to let you know that I have been thinking about you. I am hoping for the best for you! You so deserve a BFP! Hope to see you around. If you get a chance, drop me a line at my email addy.

R

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O
Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba) CD 5



Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy


In the 2WW

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 25 - 11 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Hi Heidi. You can feel free to post here as much as you like. You have been through the losses even if your not trying anymore, you still belong. I would love to see more people here.

How is everyone?

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

I am not charting or anything any more. We are still TTC but not actually "trying". KWIM? I am placing it all into God's hands and letting him take care of it!

[corjack]

Melissa, do you have a FM??

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

What is a FM?

[Sarah]

FM is a fertility monitor. You can buy them in the stores(pretty pricy $180 + the sticks) you POAS and the monitor reads where in your cycle you are. Or you can buy the stand alone sticks that are like hpt's. You judge when you O by how dark your like is compared to the referance line. I have PCOS so my FM worked like crap. I spent a small fortune on it. But the O sticks work just great for me. I only used about 3 per month so the cost is much less. Just depends on which works better for you.

We had our RE appointment the other day. It didn't really go as I thought it would. I thought if my tubes were still ok we could try the glucophage and try on our own still. Nope not the case. Because that was my second ectopic even though they were on different sides my chances for another one are VERY high. Apparently your tube isn't the only cause of tubals, in some cases it is the embryo. So even if your tubes are perfect you can still have them. makes sense since my tubes were looking fine before this and the last 4 pgys made it thru fine. I wasn't expecting that. I really thought we could still try. So that is out now. Our RE feels that PGD is really our main option here. IF we don't use it we are really gambling. I really like our RE he has gone thru IF and has a mentally retard child so he really was identifying with us. He said that the last m/c really is showing him there is something wrong with our embies and it is taking a big chance to try on our own now. I'm a little sad about that but I guess it really is best for us all. I don't want to keep going thru this. I just can't. Neither can Brandon. And I don't want to keep pushing if we will end up with a child that has severe disabilities. That isn't fair to the baby. So we'll go to ivf with pgd as soon as we can.

Yesterday my mom did something that surprised the crap out of me. Some of you know we aren't that close. We see each other but have been thru a lot of things in the past. She was divorsed for the second time over a year ago. She gave me her engagment ring, diamond wrap and a gold wedding band for me to sell. She gave us it to use the money towards our pgd. When she told me that over the phone I started to really tear up. She doesn't have a lot of money. She's not poor by any means but she could really use this money to put in her bank. And instead she's giving it to us. That really means a lot to me and honestly took so much stress off both of us. Right now we really don't have much money leftover each month so it would take us forever to pay for it. We didn't want to borrow money because we aren't sure how long it would take to pay back and we don't like that. My mom took the engagment ring and the wrap in to a pawn shop awhile ago and she offered to buy the set for $2000. That is pretty good considering they sell it for much more than that. And $2000 would pay for 1/2 the pgd. So I need to have it cleaned and then I might even check ebay to see what rings are going for. Of course we'd like to get the most for it but we also want to sell it soon to pay for our next ivf. So we'll see how that all goes. Hopefully we can get a good amount for it.

Our Re also recommended checking to see if our insurance covers a test that checks the dna fragmentation of brandon's sperm. It's not that common but can cause early m/c if that is the problem. Since we will be spending a fortune(to us anyway) on the next ivf I want to make sure we do every single freakin test we can to make sure our odds are the highest they can be. We've got one shot at this. Otherwise it will take us a very very long time to save up for a second try and I've been told time is not with us now. Dr.J said that I have the problems of his 40 yr olds and we don't have time to sit and wait.

I still haven't bled from the m/c yet, it's been 4 weeks since the metho and over 3 from the surgery. I know my hcg is 0 it's just taking forever. My lmp was 2/28! I know its going to be terrible when it shows I just wish it would get it over with. If it doesn't come soon they'll induce it. I'll start my gluco this weekend when I get to the store to pick it up. I guess we're looking at the end of the summer for our ivf. Hopefully we'll get enough funds together to pull it off.

[MamaGoofy]

Thanks for the FM info Sarah. I hope everything falls into place for you guys. I will keep y'all in my prayers.

No, I do not have an FM. I will just let nature take it's course.

[corjack]

Melissa, I was going to suggest using the sticks without the monitor, I know several girls who are doing it.

Here is a link to check it out.

http://users.ekns.net/moorell/cyclex.htm

Sarah sweety, I hope this all comes together before the end of the year and finds you with a baby in your arms next Summer!

Jackie

Jackie

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Waiting to O



Trying but not Keeping Track

Sandy

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)


In the 2WW

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 26 - 11 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah (IVF at the end of Summer :crossfing )


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[MamaGoofy]

Thanks Jackie. I have OPK kits at home. I really don't want to spend anymore money on trying to get pregnant. KWIM? God will bring the miracle to me when He feels the time is right.

[corjack]

I guess you gotta have Faith. I hope it happens for you real soon.

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Now that I am not focused on getting pg it probably will! ;)

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Currently TTC

Sandy

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 26 - 11 DPO


Waiting to TTC

Denise
Sarah (IVF at the end of Summer :crossfing )


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

I revamped the stats a little.

Jakcie

[Sarah]

Thanks Melissa and Jackie. I hope we all have babies in our arms soon.:)

Jackie that is perfect for me. Hopefully this will be the one.

[Sandy]

I am still here. I didn't start until day 34 so I was totally thinking I was pregnant. I typically start on day 28. So, that was a really disappointing day for me. I conceived my daughter the same month that I miscarried last time, so I actually had not ever had a period after a m/c before. Does that make sense? We didn't BD during the exact right time last month, so I shouldn't have been surprised we didn't get pregnant, but it was still quite upsetting for me.

But, that said, I am moving on and we are going to actively try try try this month. Day 18 falls on a weekend, which is typically the time we "get to know each other" anyway! So, great timing! Wish us luck!

Sandy

[Denise]

So sorry I havent been by!
News from dr~
Taken from my journal~

"Yesterday I went to the dr for my consult. (i originally had it on Tues but had to change it due to an appt I couldnt change)sooooo this is it-I have three elevated genetic "disorders" ANA, homocysteine, and the MTHFR DNA. All I got out of his garble was I have to take a baby aspirin everyday for prevention of blood clots, pulmonary embolisms and strokes! Wonderful ,eh? And I can never take BCP's again! So he asked if I had a sister and she should get this blood series done as well since she is on BCP's! She wasnt too thrilled wiuth me yesterday! :lol: He also said I have to start taking prometrium (orally! THANK GOD!) once I ovulated. Oh he also wants me to buy OPK's and figure out when I O and then start the prometrium. If I get preg then I take it til he hears the HB around 11 weeks! He had a very good positive response from other women with multiple m/c's and getting pg and staying pg on the prometrium!!! :) Awesome! He said he wants to see me when I get preg this month! :yippee: We are going to try! I am scared and excited at the same time. "


And then yesterday I started my OPK's at CD14 like the dr said and it was soooo faint! Guess I didnt "O" yet! I am new to OPK's and figuring out when I "O" so it might take awhile but its so exciting and scary at the same time!!

Wish me luck-Jackie you can put me in the TTC and CD15 today! :yippee:

[Denise]

I hope this is ONE of our months! :woo:

[MamaGoofy]

Denise that is so awesome!!

Sandy I know what you mean. I hate when AF is late for no apparent reason. It's really not nice!!!

Looks like we are all going to be pretty busy this month!! :brow:

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Currently TTC

Sandy

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 30 - 11 DPO

Denise CD 15


Waiting to TTC


Sarah (IVF at the end of Summer :crossfing )


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[corjack]

Sarah, I have a feeling that the next IVF will give you great success! R u taking the metformin now?

Sandy I am sorry AF showed so late. It is really ahrd not to get excited when that happens.

Denise, I am not glad you have the genetic disorders, but I am glad you got some answers. I took prometrium when I was pg too.

HI Melissa!

I am not very optomistic for a BFP this cycle. FF changed me O day from cd15 to cd19, and it looks right that way. I think I am going to rest this summer and start back up with the monitor and things in 2-3 months. I need a break and we have a BUSY summer planned.

Glad everyone is visiting!!!!!!!!!! I was getting lonely!

Jackie

[Sarah]

Denise I too hope it is a good month here!! Hopefully you wont have to get used to the OPK's for long! I'd wait a couple days before testing again. I was always able to tell when i'd get close by my cm. when it started to get ew then I knew it would be soon.

Jackie I haven't been able to make it out to the store to pick it up yet. It's been a crazy week so far. I hoped to get it today but Riley's only been napping for 30minutes and we have to leave in an hour. So it will have to wait until tomorrow.:( I am anxious to get started on it but we do have several months. IT will be at least August at the very earliest. We have lots to save for!

Sandy it's always disappointing no matter what.:( We all always hope for the best and it's hard when it doesn't work. I hope this next cycle will be a good one for you!

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Currently TTC

Sandy

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 32 - 13 DPO

Denise CD 17


Waiting to TTC


Sarah (IVF at the end of Summer :crossfing )


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[MamaGoofy]

I am now in my O window.......wonder what will happen?

[corjack]

:crossfing: Melissa!!!!!!!!!!!

[corjack]

We all have
Angels in Heaven

Currently TTC

Sandy

Melissa mamagoofy (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/86cba)

Jackie corjack (http://www2.fertilityfriend.com/home/corjack) CD 2

Denise CD 20


Waiting to TTC


Sarah (IVF at the end of Summer :crossfing )


Cheerleaders

Beverly :rahrah:
Michele :rahrah:

[MamaGoofy]

Jackie: I am sorry that last cycle wasn't it! :hug99:

I am not sure about this cycle. I haven't felt much O pains. We didn't get our groove on like I wanted us to. Oh well...if it's meant to be then it will happen.

[Bev]

Good luck to everyone this month! :)

[corjack]

Thanks Melissa. I am pretty okay. We will not really be trying very hard this cycle. After this cycle i will make my yearly appt and see about some Clomid.

Jackie

[Sarah]

Jackie I think that is a good plan. Since you only have one tube that should help to up your chances on the month you O on the right side. I hope that really does work for you.

I started my gluco this weekend. So in another 1 1/2 weeks I'll be up to the full dose. I really hope this helps. Brandon is also on good vitamins/minerals and will start taking Fertilty Blend too. We are pretty sure that the problem is me but we'll cover him too just in case. I'm still looking into the dna fragmenation of the sperm test to see if the insurance will cover it. I tried calling and they couldn't find it so I need to call back with the code number. Either way if he does have a problem, they'd treat it with the FBlend and the PGD so we might just skip it if they won't cover it. My bleeding has finally stopped. Just a little brown spotting now. I'm glad to have that all over with.

Good luck this month girls! I really hope we get some +'s.

Sarah

[corjack]

Glad things are kinda back to normal Sarah. I have heard great things about the fertility blend. I hav actually thought about trying it but am ot sure if I can take it and the Glucophage at the same time.

Jackie

[Sandy]

Ok, I have an admittidly whiny and self pitying post coming, so please feel free to not read any further. I just want to vent a little.

I am feeling sorry for myself. A good friend/co-worker just came in and told me she was pregnant. I am happy for her, but it still makes me feel frustrated and sad for myself. I guess I am just feeling that it seems so easy for others. I am pissed off that I have had another miscarriage. I am ticked b/c I tell myself that one should be enough and that it is unfair that I had another. I am upset b/c I would be about 4 months pregnant now had I not. I really want another child and am just overall frustrated and upset. It seems to be taking forever in our quest for another child. We started trying in about November. I guess I am just upset b/c I love being a mother and having our little one and I just want more of that.

Well, not much to say about this. I just wanted to get it off of my chest so that I can be rightfully excited for her. I also didn't want to vent to my husband b/c I know it upsets him too. I figured this forum was better than any other for this type of post.

Sandy

[Bev]

:hug99: Sandy, I know how you're feeling. After all my chemo I started trying at 6 months rather than the standard 12 months hoping to get pregnant right away. Lucky for me I had the support of my OB because I knew the "risks" and when I wasn't pregnant in June he was kind enough to start some testing due to my age. Then I found out I wasn't ovulating properly so he put me on Clomid and said he'd do an IUI, I asked what about DH? Then found out the sample he provided was less than stellar and he wouldn't do an IUI again and so would require ICSI. All that on top of what I'd been through? COME ON!! I did get so lucky and got pregnant the week I was to schedule the rest of my tests for the IVF.

I am very thankful I did not know anyone IRL who got pregnant, although I knew SIL was trying and I told DH I would be SO PISSED if she got pregnant before me. He didn't really understand until after I was pregnant and we found out she was 4 weeks behind me. THEN he understood the emotions I had because he said he would have been upset if she was first too.

Your feelings are perfectly normal. I'm not sure how old you are but if your doc will let you, and it will ease your mind, do some blood tests just so you know you aren't wasting time waiting for a year or 6 months to go by.

Good luck to you.

[Sarah]

Sandy I'm so sorry honey. I totally understand what you mean. My cousin announced this weekend she is pg. She is my third cousin to be pg right now. I am happy for her but it hurts so damn much knowing we've been trying for so long now and here we are no further than we were 1 1/2 years ago. And I totally agree one m/c is enough, no one should have one let alone multiple. It isn't fair to any of us. I wish that none of us ever had to go thru all the crap. It's just not fair and it sucks to put it nicely. But you do have all of us here for you. And you are right this is the place to post it! You need to get it off your chest. We've all been thru so much and we need to lean on each other to get thru it all. Most people never know the pain any of us have gone thru. So you can trust that we will all be here for you.:)

Sarah

[Sandy]

Thanks Bev and Sarah! It means a lot to come on here and read that.

I am feeling better now. It just kinda hit me hard this morning.

Bev, I totally take interest in your posts b/c I am 35 and have heard that "advanced maternal age" thing a lot as well. But, I have decided there is nothing I can do about that, so I am not worrying about it. As far as tests go, at this point, I just feel like the miscarriages were "justoneofthosethings." I had a totally normal, full term pregnancy in between the two. My progesterone levels were totally normal for that one. We got pregnant after trying for about 4 months this second time around. I am taking baby aspirin now. If I get pregnant again here shortly, I will go immediately to get my progesterone level checked. Just to be sure. But that is pretty much where I am now.

Thanks again for the support. It helps a lot to have this community here to deal w/ things like this. Makes it a lot easier and I don't have to burden people I see all the time w/ it.

Sandy

[Sarah]

:) Sandy I'm glad to hear that. And while I just turned 27, I've been told by our RE that I have the problems of his 40+ yr old patients so I can relate a bit there with you. We are being told our time left is very short.:( And I hope that you are right and your next pg(hopefully soon;)) will be a good one that lasts 40 weeks!

Not to much news for us. I O'd this weekend. Since our RE has put the kabosh on us trying on our own we are just waiting until our next and probably final ivf. We are shooting for Aug./Sept. That will put me past the 3 months off time from the methotrexate and give us some time to save some money. It has really started to sink in more and more how this may very well be our last chance at having our own baby. If this ivf is a bust, we have two choices. Donor eggs or adoption. My sister has already agreed to be a donor but she has lots of lifestyle changes to make first.(stop smoking, etc.) She wants to stop smoking way before we'd need her eggs just in case. But part of me is worried that she might have the same problems as me. That might not get us anywhere. And then there is adoption. Super expensive. And Brandon has said that he would be fine with just Riley and isn't sure he'd want to go thru adoption. So I'm really starting to feel we've hit the bottom. :( I just can't understand why this is happening and wish we knew why. I can't bear to have another m/c. So I can't keep putting myself thru this over and over again. Each time we think something is different and in the end we just lose the baby. I'm so tired. I just can't take much more of this. But I am also very obsessed with having another child. Ah, where to drawn the line. I just don't know. So for now we just wait.

Sarah

[Bev]

:hug99: Sarah. A girl on my molar board (well, she's not really a girl, she just turned 40! :lol: ) She had 8 misscarriages. She's finally pregnant again and keeping her fingers crossed. I guess it is all how much you want that baby. Really, I was told my eggs were no good, FSH way out of whack etc, and that DH's sperm was terrible and look what happened when I gave up. Time for you to move to Massachussets or wherever IVF is covered. :nod: Very nice of your sister, however.

Isn't that the trouble too Sandy, that most m/c are "just one of those things?" Doesn't make you feel any better, but can give you some hope I guess. It's all just so emotionally draining.

[Sandy]

I can't believe this!

My OTHER good friend who is also a co-worker, just walked in my office to tell me she is 9 weeks pregnant. While I am sitting here w/ what feels like cramps and I am getting ready to start. Wow. What a day. I think I am going to call it quits and head home.

Sandy

[Sarah]

:( Oh geez Sandy I'm sorry. Go home put your feet up and eat some chocolate. Sending you big hugs!!

Bev, thanks. IL does cover IVF they just don't cover the PGD(genetic testing on embryos) And that is $3500 per ivf. It may not sound like a whole lot but it is a TON of money to us. We have no money leftover each month. So coming up with that is hard. I don't know how we'd do it if we needed a second try. Especially since we don't have the time to wait and save. that is good to hear about your online friend. I hope everything works out well for her.

I'm just really getting very nervous for this ivf. More so than our others. It is really starting to seriously sink in that this may be it for us. And honestly I just don't know how I can take that. I feel so overwhelmed with so many emotions. Just not sure how to get thru this all. There is a person at our ivf clinic who deals with all this and her services are part of the package so I might give her a buzz. I just feel I've hit a wall and I don't know how to get myself over it to deal with all I have built up inside. Sometimes I feel I'm doing ok. Then others I feel like I can't even get out of bed. Maybe there is no good way of getting thru this all. I think acupuncture has helped me greatly with stress. I do feel better coming out of there but I cant do that forever. And it isn't enough anymore. But I don't know how talking would make it better either. Time I guess.

I hope we can get some BFP's here soon. I really need a pick me up!

Sarah

[Sandy]

Thanks Sarah. I finished off a spectacular day yesterday by starting. :( But, the good news is it is on day 28, so it seems my cycles are back on track. I think for next month I am going to buy some ovulation sticks just to be sure I am ovulating around the same time. Typically I O on day 18, but I just want to make sure that is still what is happening. I moped around last night and am still a little mopy, but I will get over it.

I certainly hope that this one is the charm for you Sarah! I can't imagine how hard it is. Did you call that lady at the center? I bet she will be a great help/comfort for you right now.

Sandy

[MamaGoofy]

Sandy: I know how you are feeling! :hug99:

[corjack]

Hi Girls, sorry I have been absent. I am just really burnt on the whoel TTC issue. I have been feeling a lot like Sandy. My 19 year old unmarried, unemployed neice ust found out she is pg and the father is a 17 year old high school drop out, also unemployed. UGHHHHHH!!! I know she will be responsible and also be a good mom, but why her and not me?

Anyway, I am on cd12 and really just not into trying this month. I have temped a few days and have been having EWCM, but who knows, my body gets screwier every month.

Sunday is the anniversary of when I got my BFP last year. I feel pretty sad this week. I have not said anything to Dh I am positive he does not remember and I truthfully do not want to remind him so he can be sad too.

Thinking of you girls. I hope we all have new babies this time next year!

jackie

[Bev]

:hug99: to everyone.

[Sarah]

Oh Jackie I'm sorry honey. We are here for you this weekend. Even if you don't want to talk to DH, you can talk to us about it. I really hope you get your BFP really soon.

Sandy, I haven't called yet. But I will in the near future. I don't quite feel I am ready to really talk about things. I guess deep down I feel like if I start to think about it and talk about it all it will be true and I will have a break down. I think that has been my bodys way of keeping me sane, just push it back there. I know it isn't a good thing but I guess it is all that has kept me going. I will work on it though. And if there is anything you need or want to talk about I'm here!

Well something weird is going on with my freakin body. This a.m. I started having pains on my left side again. Nothing too bad, just discomfort. I know I O'd Sunday/Monday so I thought maybe after all the trama in the last month it was just irritated. Well by the time I got home around 6 the pain was much strong and it was pain! Just like it was the other week when I had the clot and the bleeding. I haven't called my doctor yet. Just waiting it out to see what happens. I have no vaginal bleeding at all. But my belly is very swollen(wasn't at all this a.m.) and I am in pain. I have been laying with my feet up since 6.(that is what they always have me do) Hopefully this is just a weird thing. I am just so freakin sick of all this. Why can't it just go away? I just don't get it. If I can make it thru the night I'll call in the am and I'm sure they'll have me come in again for u/s and blood. I think as long as I lay down it won't get too bad. So I'm off to lay down.

In other news, my acupuncture appointment went very well. She wants me on only organic foods until after the ivf. She said my body has been thru so much that she doesn't want any other chemicals or hormones running thru it. She even stopped my herbs. She wants me to think about going in for a Mayan Uterus Massage too. There is only one guy who she knows does them well and he lives in MN. But I guess he comes to IL once a month.(this isn't a very popular thing yet but I guess it really works well) So she is going to try to get me all the info on it. So that is it for me. I'll update as things change and hopefully I'll be back tomorrow with good news.

Sarah

[MamaGoofy]

Jacki I know how you feel. I just went thru that exact feeling in March. Know that we are here for you. I don't see any reason not to say something to dh. You never know..he may be feeling the same way..at least you won't be sad alone and maybe he can help you smile. :hug99: Take it easy.

[Gymboreegirl]

I just want to say hang in there to all of you wonderful ladies. I never had a MC, but lost a baby at 34 weeks so I do feel you pain. Just wanted to give you all big hugs!

[corjack]

Gym...girl.. , you did not post your name but I just want to send you a hug. I cannot imagine how much that must hurt. How are you now? Was it your first pgcy? Did they find out why?


Jackie

[Sarah]

:( gymboreegirl I'm so very sorry for the loss of your baby. I can't even imagine how hard that must be. If there is anything you need we are here for you.

Sarah

[Gymboreegirl]

Jackie and Sarah thank you! We lost Geoffrey at 34 weeks due to a cord accident, he would have been 15. Even though it has been so long I still get upset and think hey if he had lived he would be starting drivers training and so on. He was our first and our whole world came crashing down around us. I still feel that it has made me a stronger person, I do over protect my kiddos too much thou but for good reasons. I just wanted to reassure everyone that life does go on, you will get pregnant again and yes you will always have those fears and what ifs through every child you have. Don't over do it and try to hard, don't take it out on each other you need to support each other and understand what the other is going through. Ok I am rambling, good luck everyone amd if you need to chat I am normally on a few times a day.:sunny:

[Bev]

Gym, very sorry to hear of the loss of Geoffrey. :hug99: I bet the pregnancies you had after were terrifying. I know I'd be a wreck.

[Gymboreegirl]

I was a wreck until I could hold my baby. On the inside I was a mess, but put a good front on the outside!:5pounds:

[corjack]

Uuuugh, I am dreading being pg again. I just want to have a baby, not be pg. Unfortuneately it does not work that way.

Jackie

[Kathryn]

Jackie!! :wavey: I see you!! How are you doing?

:heart:
Kate

[Kathryn]

I didn't meant to barge in on this thread.. sorry...

:bighug: Gymboreegirl

[corjack]

Kate, I am not subscribed here so I cannot Pm or visit journals. I was wondering how you were. Your journal just closed.

I will email you at your katemod email

Jackie

[MamaGoofy]

Hello guys!! It's been a while. I have had a rough couple weeks. Gymboreegirl: I am so sorry. That must have been terrible. :hug99:

Well I am back to square one or should I say CD4. I hope everyone is hanging in there.

[Gymboreegirl]

Oh thank you girls, it was terrible mamagoofy. But I was just posting to offer hope and hugs not hijack the topic.:blush:

[MamaGoofy]

You are fine!! Thanks for posting and sharing your experience. It does offer hope. What is your name????

[Gymboreegirl]

Debbi mamagoofy what is yours?

[MamaGoofy]

I am Melissa!!! Welcome to OUAL Debbie!! :hug99:

[Gymboreegirl]

Thank you Melissa, this is such a nice group.:sunny: I am getting this whole internet thing down pat. Do you belong to any other groups?

[MamaGoofy]

Other than OUAL? No...
I do belong to the 2002 and earlier Playgroup and I play around all over this site. I don't venture much into the internet world.

[Gymboreegirl]

Me too this internet stuff can be a little scarey if you don't know what you are doing.

[MamaGoofy]

KWYM! :lol:

[Bev]

Hey Debbi! I think the hard part about getting pg again after something like that is that other people believe it shouldn't be a big deal, but it is the biggest deal ever and you can't really share except for here or with people who really understand, and you don't want to find one of them because it means they've gone through the same thing and you wouldn't want anyone to have to go through that!

[Gymboreegirl]

Totally agree Beverly! Until you have gone through a loss big or small it is still a loss one should not be judgemental. Oh I had business associates tell oh come on there is nothing to worry about, I was hello when you have a stillbirth than come talk to me. I am living proof that one can go on to have children after such a tragic loss, the fear will ALWAYS be there tucked away in the back of your head and yes you will have the what if's through it all, but stay strong support yourself and your partner and together you will get through those rough days. I am so glad you ladies have a place to come to for love and support, when I lost our son I had no place to go to. HUGS to all of you and stay strong!:grouphugg

[MamaGoofy]

Aww Debbi you are so sweet! :hug99: Thanks!

[Gymboreegirl]

Melissa if you need to chat or vent just let me know, hugs to you!:justahug:

[MamaGoofy]

Thanks!!! I hope you subscribe. I would love to get to know you better!! Where do you live?

[Gymboreegirl]

Melissa I am in Michigan where are you? I am saving my peenis for a subscription and hope to get to know you better too. Tell me a little about what has happened to you if you can talk about it.

[MamaGoofy]

I am in Brandon, FL (just east of Tampa). I had my wonderful son in December 2001. We waited a while before ttc again (we wanted a couple years between the two). So October 2003 I went off the pill and we were OTL. March of 2004 I got my bfp. I was so excited and a bit nervous as that meant that both of our children were going to have early December birthdays. I went to the doctor to have everything confirmed. My doctor did a sonogram and said that the sac did not look healthy and that my body may be trying to miscarry. Two days later I started losing the baby. I went back to the doctor and they tested my levels to make sure they were going down. They were but I was having severe cramps for about 3 weeks and my doctor wanted to go in and check to make sure that I wasn't having a tubal. I didn't want to do it. I think it was partly denial. So after 3 weeks of terrible pain I went to the ER one night. They thought it was a cyst on my ovary. The next day I went back to my doctor for a follow up. He told me that he really needed to go in so he could check and see what was going on. He had been thinking it was ectopic from the beginning. I finally agreed. So the day before Mother's Day I was in the hospital having a D&C and my right tube removed. In June we started trying again and so far I have come up negative every month. It's been a long year and I am about to get discouraged. I figure if I don't get a bfp this month then next month when my yearly is due I will talk to him about it.

Sorry you asked???

[Gymboreegirl]

Oh Melissa:justahug: of course I am not sorry I asked! WHat a long road you have been on this past year. How are you really holding up? Trust me when I say don't try so hard and try to relax! It took us almost 2 years to get pregnant with my eldest and we ended up taking a trip to Vegas and really relaxing for us to get a positive result. Funny thing was we had decided on that trip to give up on the idea of having children really enjoyed ourselves and had the best sex, oh can we use that word on here?:blush: in the whole time we had been ttc. Hang in there girl, give your ds lots of hugs and kisses and don't try so hard! I really am a firm believer that we but too much pressure and stress on ourselves to have kids. Studies have shown that stress is a major cause of infertility, saw that on the Today show. Oh and men can be a big cause too, did you know that if the family jewels get too hot as in temperature it causes infertility? Hot tubs, saunas, laptop computers and too tight of pants are some of the causing factors. Thank goodness it is not permanant and will get back to normal in a few months. Ok sorry babbling on and on, NOW who is sorry!:lol:

[MamaGoofy]

I don't know how to answer your question on how I am really holding up. Some days are better and then I watch the news and here how a mother beat her 5 week old child and I ask "why did God give her that baby when he could have given it to me?" :bawl: Those situations really kill me. I have taken all of my ttc focus and put it towards losing weight. I joined LA Weightloss yesterday to help me lose the 50 pounds that I want to lose. I figure somewhere along the way I will get pregnant. At times I just say to myself that my David is the only child I will have and that I should be thankful for that miracle. Then the selfish part of me screams.."I have more love to give and I want no I NEED another child! My family is NOT complete." So that is basically how I am doing!!! Most days I am ok and I just keep a positive attitude and say "When God is ready to bless me with another miracle I will get my bfp. It WILL happen."

PS: I think we can say sex here. I've never been told of any rules that we can't.

[Gymboreegirl]

Oh you sounded like I used to sound. I would have good days and than I would here aout some jerk of a mom who hurt or killed her baby and I would scream and cry and curse. I could not go to the mall or even look at my new baby niece who by the way is the same age as my son I lost. It is good that you are focasing on something else like weight loss. I did that got tiny and into a bikini and looked "HOT" No sooner did I lose all the wieght I got my positive. Good luck in the weight loss department, boy I need to go on one put on weight during the winter and need to get it off.:blush1:

[MamaGoofy]

A friends baby shower is tomorrow and I had to get her a gift. I went into Babies R Us and soo didn't want to be there. I was so depressed walking thru that freaking store. What sucks is I was really excited to go to the stupid store. I did see a lot of cute little girl outfits! :love2: I need a little girl!!

[Gymboreegirl]

:pray:That you get you wish for a girl! Oh I so know what you mean about the stores, I think it took me about 6 months before I could go near any store that might have a baby in it.

[MamaGoofy]

:hug99: Thank you Debbie.. you have no idea how much talking about this today has really helped me!!

[Gymboreegirl]

Oh Melissa I am so glad I was here for you, like I said anytime you need to talk just let me know!:sunny:

[MamaGoofy]

Well I am now in my ovulating cycle. DH and I are :sex: like rabbits.. I :pray: this is my cycle!!

[Bev]

I hope both you and Dave are chowing down on the brownies beforehand! :lol: Good luck! :)

[Gymboreegirl]

Well I am now in my ovulating cycle. DH and I are :sex: like rabbits.. I :pray: this is my cycle!!
Good luck and here are some :pray: that it is your cycle!

[MamaGoofy]

I hope both you and Dave are chowing down on the brownies beforehand! :lol: Good luck! :)

I would be joining him but I can not have them...they are BAD for my new diet!!

Thanks for all the :pray:

[corjack]

Hey ladies sorry I have not been by in a while. We are currently TAB, I am just so tired of TTC and really burnt out.

Thinking of all you gals!

[MamaGoofy]

I understand Jacky. You can always come here to talk if ya need to!! :hug99:

[Gymboreegirl]

Melissa just wonder how you are and hope things are going well for you.:hug99:

[MamaGoofy]

I am doing fantabulous!!! I have lost 6.8 pounds in 2 weeks and I feel marvelous. I am in the middle of my 2ww. AF is due to arrive next Saturday so we shall see what happens. And ya know what? If I don't get my bfp then that means we just get to try again. If at first you don't succeed try try again. Failure only happens when you stop trying!! I am so motivated right now to lose weight that I am not really paying to much attention to ttc. I mean I know when my fertile days are and when AF is due but other than that..I don't worry about i