We are at the end of our rope with Aidan and his whining. He is constantly whining and will NOT stop for anything. NOTHING. He cannot be distracted, reasoned with, or anything. I've asked him to go to his room and whine in there, because I don't want to listen to it anymore, and he'll FLIP OUT ON ME ("nooooooooo" ...like he is afraid of his room). And timeouts....we dont do them -- part of me doesnt agree w/ them, but also he wont sit in one. The only way he will stop is if we give in to what he wants and well, its not an option. And I am not saying that to be a hardass, because I'd like to think we pick our battles. Our house is fucking miserable because of it.

What can I do to get him to stop?!?! He is NOT a pleasant child to be around!!

What exactly is triggering the whining/what is he whining about?

We have similar issues with Aidan not accepting punishment well/thinking it's a joke, but it's not whining that's our issue. He gets into trouble in other ways. :devil:

Everything I've read says to ignore the whining and say things like "you need to speak clearly because I can't understand you when you whine" and so on. Joe doesn't whine too much, but it seems to work fairly well with him. But they're all different.

Dennis

He whines about things he wants. Let me give you some examples:

The other day, I was driving in the car, heading home. I asked what he wanted for lunch and he said pizza. So 2 minutes later, he starts whining, " I WANT PIZZA!" over & over. I calmly explain that he can have it when we get home, but not now b/c does it look like I have pizza in the car? No, that is silly! 1 minute later, "I WANT PIZZA!" this goes on for 15 minutes.

Yesterday, he wanted to paint. I was fixing lunch for the twins and said that no, I couldnt get it out right now and he needed to find something else to play with. He immediately started whining and would not stop. I asked if he wanted to color. Noooo. I couldnt stop what I was doing b/c the twins were about to melt down (they could see me making lunch and were like sharks circling my feet!!!), and i already told him 'no', so I couldnt retract my decision, either.

Tonight at dinner, he started whining because he wanted to make a fort. WTF?! We were in the middle of eating dinner! We told him that we'd make a fort when we were done eating. NOOOOOO! he wanted to make one NOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW! Meltdown.

I am serious...this is ridiculous. And there is one going on right now. Chris is putting him to bed and Aidan is whining again about wanting something or the other and Chris just told him no and he started crying and Chris just stormed out muttering "i cant f**&^&# take this anymore" and Aidan is upset, saying, "no, come back. I will stop" :(

WHY DOES HE DO THIS?!?

Oh yeah, I've done that, Dennis. It worked a few months ago, but not anymore :dunno:

Natascha was and still is a whiner. :rolleyes: Kids that age have a hard time expressing what is wrong or what they want. Heck, sometimes I wonder if they actually know what they want themselves. :lol:
So he basically whines all the time? Or does it coincide when he is tired, hungry?
Although the ignoring method doesn't seem to work right now, unfortunately, ignoring it and telling him that this is not acceptable is one way to attack the whining.
Do you think, he might want some attention, even if it is negative right now?

Praise a lot when he does verbalize his needs politely.

What works for us, since Caroline is a HORRIBLE whiner, is not isolating her to her room, but we leave! "I'm going in the living room, because that noise is hurting my ears. When you're done and can talk normally, come see me and we'll figure it out."

What works for us, since Caroline is a HORRIBLE whiner, is not isolating her to her room, but we leave! "I'm going in the living room, because that noise is hurting my ears. When you're done and can talk normally, come see me and we'll figure it out."

Alex is horribly whiny at times, ok, a lot of the time......we leave the room too. I tell him to come to me when he's ready to talk like a big boy and use his words. I do notice that Alex whines more when he's not getting my attention. When I'm making dinner, helping Dylan with her homework, talking on the phone, putting away laundry......so more or less all the time that I'm not talking to him, reading to him or playing with him.....:rolleyes:

Sorry Karri, not much help, but I feel your pain.

What can I do to get him to stop?!?! He is NOT a pleasant child to be around!!

Ask him if he wants any cheese to go with that whine :lol:

No seriously I am right there with you with Emma. I tell her she needs to ask me or talk to me the right way (lack of better term) and I don't usually ever give in to whine.

WHY DOES HE DO THIS?!?

Probably for your reaction to it I would guess. Seems he is like Emma in some ways and I know she does it to get to me like in your example I would have said one time "you can't have pizza in the car" and ignored the rest of it completely if he gets no reaction he probably would stop?

Oh Karri, I don't have any advice but wanted to send you support! I am almost certain he will grow out of it. When Sean was little, I did what Anne and Becky did, I took my own time out! Sounds like Chris did it too. "mommy is going to take a time out right now, because your winning is bothering me and I'm about to start screaming.." Hang in there, Joan

Karri Alex is the same way and it is driving me and DH insane! Sometimes putting him in is room works but not very often. i give him 3 chances to stop whining and after the third time i take to his room. He then of course flips put and crys so hard that i feel like the worst mother in the world. I only leave him there for 5 minutes and then he does stop for a little while. However I will say lately that hasn't worked. So i guess that i am really no help sorry :(.

Well at least I am not alone, though I am sorry that anyone else is subject to this. Chris actually said, "what the hell did we do wrong?" :lol: So apparently, nothing? :lol:

Ok...I am going to try not to react...at all. I guess he could be trying to get my attention. I mean, I try and give him as much as possible, but naturally, that isnt possible in a house with two other children aside from him. He's not lacking attention.

For some reason, I thought things would have gotten better when he started preschool.

Kris --I think Aidan and Emma are the same kid, only a different sex :lol:

Well at least I am not alone, though I am sorry that anyone else is subject to this. Chris actually said, "what the hell did we do wrong?" :lol: So apparently, nothing? :lol:

Ok...I am going to try not to react...at all. I guess he could be trying to get my attention. I mean, I try and give him as much as possible, but naturally, that isnt possible in a house with two other children aside from him. He's not lacking attention.

For some reason, I thought things would have gotten better when he started preschool.

Kris --I think Aidan and Emma are the same kid, only a different sex :lol:


:lol2:

James and I were wondering just last night "what the hell we did wrong to make Jacob as awful to be around as he is???"

Forget about Aiden and Emma...Jacob got them BOTH beat for evilness :lol:

whining....screaming...throwing things...
hitting...crying...tantrums...clawing...
throwing himself on the floor in a fit of rage...

That's our nightly routine. :blush1: Jennifer babysat the boys the other night and when I returned she came up and gave me a big hug and a kiss and she said very seriously "I can't believe that you haven't killed them yet" :lol:

Right now...the only thing that helps is NOT reacting - AT ALL. So if he screams "I hate you you are stupid!!" I just smile and say "Yes my darling, I know...would you like some more milk?" that will send him into a bigger rage and after he has used up everything in his arsenal and still no reaction from anyone...he gives up :dunno: Then he is usually fine for the rest of the night...

All I am doing now...is counting down the days till he starts school :lol:

OMG! Madelynn is the same way! :tearhair: It drives me freaking insane! I think most of her problem is that she's over tired though.

Jayden does the EXACT same thing! I think we had the painting thing happen over the weekend. :rolleyes: But he will pout off to his room by himself and say "I don't yike you" :lol: I say "well that's not nice, and I still love you"

OMG --I feel for you, Melissa. What great birth control for Jen, though :lol2:

Ok...so today, we are at a St. Paddy's Playgroup Potluck and Aidan starts his whining and I just nochalantly say, "you know what? I am not going to listen to you until you can talk to me nicely. No whining." and I turned around and walked away. I did it several times over the course of the morning, but it seemed to work o.k. (well, it worked better than what I was doing, which was trying to reason with him).

Now if I could just detach him from the inside of my freaking thigh.... :rolleyes:

David went through this. I feel for you!! I tried a couple things and they seemed to work. One of which you are doing already, not reacting. That is hard to do!! The second thing that we did that worked (and it's easier when you only have one child) was to pay more attention to David. We would make 30 minutes of the evening David only time. We would get down on the floor and play whatever he wanted to play. We also noticed that he needed to get more sleep. We were being relaxed about his bed time and it was getting to be 9 or 9:30 before he would finally get into bed. Once we put him back to his regular bedtime (8:30) he seemed to calm down.

Good luck. I hope the whining stops and soon. :justahug: I hope some of this works. Just stay consistant. ;)

I'm only here to read the advice... Caroline does this too and lately, she starts to cry at everything! Whining was bad, but I think the constant crying might be worse... and I'm sad to read that preschool isn't helping, I keep saying to myself, oh once she gets in preschool, it will get better. Guess not.

I'm only here to read the advice... Caroline does this too and lately, she starts to cry at everything! Whining was bad, but I think the constant crying might be worse... and I'm sad to read that preschool isn't helping, I keep saying to myself, oh once she gets in preschool, it will get better. Guess not.

:lol: Honest to God...I would be afraid to put Jacob into pre-school right now....

I'm counting down the days to KINDERGARDEN!! :lol: :lol:

The second thing that we did that worked (and it's easier when you only have one child) was to pay more attention to David. We would make 30 minutes of the evening David only time.

Yeah, its hard w/ two other kids, but Aidan gets at least 30 minutes of mommy time in the morning while the twins nap, and then once they are in bed at night, he has mommy & daddy all to himself and we focus on him until his bedtime. So he's not lacking in the attention dept.

I've been consistent w/ my approach and so far, it works well.....except when he's tired or hungry. If that is the case, i can forget it...i am screwed (understandably so, I guess :lol: )


NOW I just need help w/ the "glommy mommy" phase. ANYONE? HELP! I thought he'd be over this by now, especially w/ being in preschool.
He cries when I drop him off (he's fine within 5 minutes of me leaving...I know this for a fact...and he's fine for the rest of the day, but he talks about me picking him up alllllll day to his teachers :rolleyes: ) . When we are out at social mommy things, he clings to me. If I pee, he's gotta be there with me. :rolleyes: its getting old, it reeeeeeally is.

We are having similar problems. I think, for us at least, that Carter wants more attention and he is trying to assert his independence by calling the shots. We try to ignore him, tell him that we can't understand what he is saying when he whines, and to take our own time outs!